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HOME > EPISODE SUMMARIES

The Real World: Key West - Episode 5 Summary

'Lil Miss Pouty Pants' By batts
Original Airdate: March 28, 2006

It's time to start working! The roomies are modeling the Key West commercial business space to become a tanning salon. Ricky Croft (vice president Mystic Tan Corporation) has the roomies involved in the construction phase of the job. We see all hands on deck, painting, sawing, hammering, drilling, wrenching, grinding, pumping, screwing, and sweating. Generators are purring, and air compressors pumping, the roomies goal is to create an environment of relaxation for the tanning spa.

Above the noise, Svetlana comments on the colors the walls should have been painted. "I wish this blue was like, less bland and had more brown or bronze in it."

Svets voice is like nails being dragged on a blackboard to Tyler, who asks her why she is talking, and not doing anything.

Tyler confessional: "When Svetlana talks, I feel like getting a knife and start cutting myself. I can't even be in the same room with her without saying something mean to her."

Tyler then tells her "If you worked half as hard as much as you ran your mouth, we would be a lot further." Svetlana starts to say something back, but Tyler cuts her off, and tells her "shut up before I drop kick your @ over HIGHWAY 1... End of conversation."

Svetlana goes to the bank with Jose and Ricky Croft and decides it's time to express how qualified she is to be the manager. She woos charms on Ricky, and tells him how she singlehandedly managed her parents' business, worked her rear end off, and showed her parents how hard she could work. She then expresses how she is the only one of the seven who is remotely qualified to boss everyone around manage a business.

Tyler gets word that Svetlana wants to be the manager and will have none of THAT! "I think collectively, our house will not let that happen. She's the youngest, most immature person in the house. She talks too much, and pouts all the time. She uses up all the hot water for her morning bath, and she smells bad in the evening."

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Zach tells everyone "I wanna be manager." Tyler continues his Svetlana massacre.... "Svetlana doesn't listen, and she doesn't care about other peoples perspectives. She's a 'My way or the highway'... kind of person."

That evening, Zach tells Svetlana he wants to be the manager. Lil Miss Pouty Pants informs him that "you can't be the manager, because I've already talked to Ricky (V.P. Mystic Tan), and I'm going to be the manager. I told him how qualified I am, and how I'm the only logical choice for the position, and he said 'OK'."

Zach: "You can't do that, go behind everyone's back, without talking to us as a group."

Svets eyes bug out like that crazy Toni beotch on Love Cruise
, and asks Zach "Are you serious? You wanna be the manager?" She then proceeds in her quest to tell Zach every reason he shouldn't be the manager. "You didn't even have a job before this."

She goes on to tell him "I will not work with Tyler, and that beotch Janelle. I will not help your marketing. I am the manager, and if you take that away from me, then you're going to have a problem with me." She continues: "Zach, you have no backbone, nobody respects you, Zach, you're worthless, and not worthy to slither on my floor."

Now.... we see Zach, looking up at the ceiling, wondering how it has come to this. He thinks back on all the times he has held this swamp woman's hand in the past few days, heard her horror stories, and nurtured her pity party attitude.

She tells him "If I'm not manager.... I'm going home." [Um.... I thought this was home? Am I mistaken, or are they not supposed to regard this as their home?]

The next day, we get to see the athletic side of Tyler. He gets up at 5:30 AM, and goes swimming. He talks about how he has found a swim team in Key West, as a diversion from the horrors of living with six straight people.
[Side thought: I couldn't help but wonder if the swim team he has found, were gay. Seriously..... I find it a lot more fun, and inspirational, to jog with others you can relate to, and share with. And I couldn't help but ponder the possibilities of future friendships with a Key West Swim Team... just a thought]

The carpet arrives and they decide to roll it out in the street to measure and cut it. This would be all fine and dandy, except, on the street....... are cars, and trucks, and motorcycles. Cars are stopped, horns are honking, insults are flying, and fingers are flipping. One motorcycle mama on a Harley Davidson (Hog) proceeds over the carpet, and leaves 'Hog' tracks right down the center of the carpet.

Our next scene takes us to Jose, and Tyler. They are sittin on the Dock of the Bay... Watchin the Tide.... rollin away. They talk about life, love, accomplishments, and inspirations, do some bonding, and express their own challenges. We learn of Tylers Tri-athalon dreams, and bi-athalon challenges, and discover he's won a trophy in a swimming event.

The roomies are hosting a dinner for Ricky Croft. Svetlana takes over cooking the meal, and we see her slicing and dicing, chopping, peeling, and pounding out a dinner for the Queen of England. She makes the preparation some kind of production process, and becomes Hitler of the Kitchen.

Zach: "Fitz, seriously, you turn into a Nazi with this stuff."

Svetlana: "Zach, do you know how to preheat the oven?" Zach ignores the intended insult, and looks for the bottle of Martinellis Sparkling Apple Cider he misplaced.

Svetlana: "Somebody needs to set the table. Chop these onions, peel the potatoes, shave the carrots, slice the celery..... comeon..... Chop Chop everybody!"

The roomies try to calm Svetlana down, but her reply is "If I was invited to dinner, and when I arrived, if the dinner wasn't ready...... I'd be irritated." Um.... I wonder at this point, how many of the roomies are ever going to invite Svetlana to dinner after Key West is finished.

Ricky arrives and they eat. Did anybody notice the burned chicken? Thats what honey will do, if the heat is on too high. Maybe Zach didn't know how to preheat the oven? Hmmmmm

After dinner they discuss who the manager will be.  Little Miss Pouty Pants sits with a long face when it's put to vote. Zach gets the vote for 'Manager', and Jose gets voted in as 'Assistant Manager'.

Svet pouts herself to bed, oh, but wait, gotta call her boyfriend on the phone first, and pout to him, and make sure HE knows the world isn't fair, and all the house is set against her.

Svetlana goes on to say "All I am is in charge of finance. Are you kidding me? I can't even add!" Oh, my gosh. Who's kidding who? She can't add..... and she wants to be "Manager?"

Svetlana then gives the roomies the list of things 'TO BE ACCOMLISHED' since she's not "Manager" and tells them it's up to them now. She then stomps off to bed leaving them all in a state of unbelievable awe. Oh, can somebody please shoot me now.

What do you think? Will Svetlana find love? Will she go home early? When she starts talking, will Tyler start cutting himself?

Find out next time on: The Real World Key West!












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