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HOME > EPISODE SUMMARIES

The Real World: Philadelphia - Episode 16 Summary

'I'm Not Drunk...I Just Have These Blackouts!' By volsfan
Original Airdate: January 4, 2005

Before I get started just let me say that I hope things get interesting soon because this boring season is getting old. How many more times do we have to see Landon get drunk? How many more times is he going to apologize? How many more times am I going to have to summarize a show where nothing happens or at least nothing that advances the story line. What happens when people stop being polite and start getting real?

We start off with Dumb and Dumber having straight guy night out. The clever ones stumble into Tom Drinker’s Tavern and have broken the Cardinal Sin of Mel! This is the bar that Mel told everyone to stay away from because that is her place to go to get away from the roomies. I guess this answers our earlier questions of where Mel was…bitch is passed out at the tavern!

Things don’t go well in the bar as Landon tells us that it is sad at how rude people can be by telling them to f-off and that they suck. Landon says suck like it is a bad thing! Oh the irony of this little segment! Just wait till Landon blows a gasket.

The next morning Mel states her frustrations toward MJ and Landon for going to HER bar and that it is her way of getting away from her lovely roomies. Shavonda uses a confessional to say that Mel doesn’t even know her last name but yet she needs time away from her? Vonda honey, I don’t want to get to know your nappy ass any more than I have to and I am sure that Mel feels the same way.

Landon has a revelation that he doesn’t think Mel likes him! Well Einstein, most people don’t like others that get drunk and become a royal arsehole! I can honestly say that if I were to spend time with Landon that I would conclude that Landon is as gay as a Christmas goose! The man acts gay to me…just saying.

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Vonda and Omaramo go out shopping and end up talking about Vonda acting “white”. WTF is acting white? How does one act white? Omaramo asks Vonda why she doesn’t embrace more of what they are? Omaramo has some warped sense of this whole hip-hop thing. In his eyes, all blacks like the exact same things! Now I get it…Omaramo thinks all gays are drag queens except him and that is why everyone is out of his spectrum. *runs to find my pink pumps*

Vonda and Omaramo continue to discuss seeing color. Vonda says she doesn’t see color and she only sees the person. Omaramo says he can’t get past the color. Well, Vonda has lied…didn’t she call MJ or Landon a white ass mother f*****? Also, Omaramo has deep issues as well. At least Omaramo admits the way he is and the way he has acted has been wrong and that’s hard to admit. Maybe there is hope yet.

The next night? MJ and Landon go out drinking to blow it out! SURPRISE! They start off by doing a mind eraser and Landon complains that they need a stronger drink! MJ and Landon are shown talking to a group of guys and they act as friends. Then, Landon and another guy exchange shirts mid-bar. Landon switched to a yellow shirt with black letters that read “HUGGABLE”. Let’s see what Mel will think about that when wino wiener gets back to the house. Landon proceeds to get wasted to the point that his speak is inaudible. MJ tells him they need to leave and Landon talks him into staying for one more round.

The madness hits the fan when drunkard gets back to the house. I am not sure exactly how it started because MJ and Landon were in the same cab but MJ is shown standing in the doorway with Mel and “half her perfect bar friends”. Landon can be seen struggling to get out of the cab. In a confessional, Landon says that Mel had told them (her roomies) that her bar friends would not like them and Landon says he gets mad when he sees them going into the house. Well, I don’t guess these bar friends will like the roomies because Mel has used them as her sounding board for everything going on in the house. What idiots! We go to a commercial as Landon tells Mel to, “step the fvck down, bitch”!

As the pissing contest continues, one of the perfect bar friends tells Landon that he will break his f’ing jaw. Mel goes to MJ and asks if he can talk to Landon. MJ pulls Landon in the house and then tells the bar friends that they are welcome. Landon walks around screaming, “there’s gonna be fights!” Landon has gone from huggable to bitch in 4.2 seconds.

Mel and her friends are playing pool and Landon is in the kitchen. Landon is hilariously talking to himself and giving Mel a thumbs up. Tattoo boy goes to get a beer and Landon stares him down looking at him like WTF are you doing. Tattoo boy walks out and Landon flips him off. Landon is frying a steak and puts a knife in his back pocket…step back he’s going to blow!

Omaramo intervenes and goes to try and calm Landon. Landon tells Omaramo that 3 of the guys are gonna be opened up with knives. Landon now has his hands full of knives. Where did all these knives come from? Omaramo calls for MJ to come help him. MJ is just standing around like nothing is happening. Landon vows, “they better be about close to being gone.” This guy is so drunk he can’t talk but he is ready to slice some beef! Drunk boy needs help.

MJ, in a confessional, says that he doesn’t want Landon to fight the tattoo people because he would be right there with him. MJ isn’t drunk and he thinks he and MJ can whip 6 guys at one time? As I said earlier…Dumb and Dumber!

MJ pulls Landon into a closet (hell MJ, let him come out of the closet!) to talk some sense into him. MJ tells Landon that they can’t beat up everyone in Philly and Landon says he is sorry for being mad but that’s just him. Yeah Landon, you are an alcoholic that gets violent when you are drunk…get help!

The next day Landon tells Mel that her friends were rude! BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Mel asks Landon what he did before her friends even entered the house. He has no clue! Landon and Mel make-up and apologies are said. Landon apologizes just like all good alcoholics! Landon actually said that “when I black out”. Honey you are drunk not blacked out!

OH.MY.HECK! I have just noticed that Landon is wearing a T-shirt that says, “Got Crabs?” Well, from the previews, Mel has something. I am LMAO right now!

Landon admits that he has a problem and that he is gonna stop at 5 drinks! 5 drinks? Great, after that, he will go home and “black out” because he is drunk! GEEZ! Landon the lush just keeps going!

Next week? Mel gets scabies! Thank goodness I don’t have that episode. Have fun Skiver!

OH.THE.DRAMA!












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