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Big Brother 5 - Episode 15 Summary

'Not the Brightest Bulb in the Box' By strid333
Original Airdate: August 10, 2004

Previously, Scott said bye bye, which shocked the Four Donkey Alliance. They felt betrayed by Adria, who actually was Adria and Natalie. That twist was revealed to the house, and then Gnomeis (a.k.a. Jennifer) won HOH (Head of Household). Nocturneis came up with a plan (called the 6 – fingered plan) that will get rid of Jase, and to implement the plan, she nominated Diane and Marvin. Jase, being Jase, is oblivious to the whole scheme.

Then we get those wishy-washy credits that cry elevator and lullaby in one song. Yeah, this song is an insipid version of what you hear in the doctor’s waiting room.

Ok, we’re into the show. Actually, we aren’t. If that “Previously on Big Brother . . .” thing wasn’t good enough for you, we get a flashback. How do you know it is a flashback? Because they use that dramatic black and white thing. Anyway, the flashback is shows Nonchalantis’s explanation of her nominations. Jase celebrated for getting his key first (which I must say was hilarious) and Cowboy (a.k.a. Michael) was surprised that Diane got nominated instead of Jase. Nomenclatureis said the whole thing was a big act and told the nominated not to take it personally. It was part of the master scheme. The twins faked tears, and the nominated Diane just wanted to burst out laughing.

The next sequence shows Karen describing the 6 – fingered plan. Blah blah blah the people competing in the POV (Power of Veto) competition will all be in the same alliance blah blah blah Jase will be nominated blah blah blah we sing Na na na na na na Hey hey hey GOODBYE to Jase. And Jase, being the wonderful, astute, and powerful player that he is, is completely fooled. He thinks he is safe, and that his hogwash speech to Nicodermis worked. Cowboy hopes that the fact that he and Nomadis share the same DNA will help keep him safe.

Oh and speaking of DNA, we just can’t skip those wascally twins, can we? According to the twin that joined the house (Natalie, if you are getting confused, but I doubt it because I am assuming that you, dear reader, have more intelligence than the average BB HG (Big Brother Houseguest)), the house hasn’t recovered from it. The other HG want to know every little detail about the twins and which one played the competitions in the past. The HG also realize that they look very different. Nominativeis totally noticed that they have totally different @$$3$. Karen also realizes that they have a tight bond and the strongest alliance, thanks to . . . do I need to spell it out? Drew and Diane could also join with the twins and form a good alliance.

Commercial break. You don’t care about the commercials I watch because I don’t care about the commercials I watch.

We are back to the show with Marvin dancing. My eyes . . . my frickin’ eyes. . . Marvin proves that not all black people have smooth moves. If you think that is bad, it only gets worse. Cowboy dances. And I’m not talking about the two-step or a line dance or the waltz or a square dance. No. I wish I could say it was one of those dances. Rather than the listed dances, Cowboy “breakdances” and not well, might I add. It looks, um, wrong, on so many levels. I’ll leave it there.

Homer – So what do you think, Marge? All I need is a title. I was thinking along the lines of “No TV and beer make Homer” something, something.
Marge – Go crazy?
Homer – Don’t mind if I do.
The Simpsons - Treehouse of Horror V

What does this have to do with this summary, you ask? Karen is going crazy. I think it would be sweet if she started swinging an axe only to be cured with the “television's warm glowing warming glow.” But it is nowhere near that exciting. Knuckleboneis describes the crazy cycle that Karen goes through. Karen starts happy, to worried, to stressed, to anxious, to a baking (as in the food) spree, to compliments on the cooking, then to depressed or stressed, then to tears, until someone comforts her, then becomes happy again, until the cycle continues. About as clear as mud, I say. I’ve been like that but my cycle lasts longer than one day.

Hmmm, is it just me or have they avoiding strategizing in this episode of BB for a while? I guess it isn’t just me, because the next little segment shows strategizing. Wow. Marvin says to Jase, “I think Diane is a pawn.”

And after Marvin made that comment, Jase JUST figured out the plan to get rid of him. Swift? Nah. Jase also realized that he won’t have any power this time around in the POV competition.

Oh joy oh happy. Another commercial break. Well, not really.

And we are back when Nonfictionis gathers everyone for the POV competition. If you are the least bit interested, Nonconformistis chose Adria, then Marvin chose Will, followed by Diane who chose Drew. Nonsenseis said that the look on Jase’s face was of helplessness (and that could’ve been the first time this whole game).

Well, Jase, in desperation, wants Drew to win this sucka and not use it. And in a bold move, Drew LIES (his first major lie, in fact) to Jase’s face that he will not use the POV. I, on the other hand, couldn’t be happier that Drew lied to Jase.

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