Previously on I'm A Celebrity ... Get Me Out Of Here! ...
Robin said that he thought living in the rain forest would be like the Garden of Eden. Instead, the faux celebrities have been tired, wet and even a little hungry. Now Robin knows why Eve ate the apple; she wanted out of Eden. Robin already tried to lead a walkout. Tonight, thought, one of these fauxies will be booted involuntarily. Will it be Adam or Eve?
Time to anoint a new leader. It's Alana, who says that you can be a leader without barking out orders constantly like a drill sergeant. Perhaps. We'll see.
Alana requests volunteers for the various tasks that need to be done. Sorry, no takers ... and Bruce and Robin make snide comments about her behind her back.
Robin is cooking, after he drove everyone away with his carping. He's making bean soup. Temporary camp leader Alana wants rice with her soup. She says that they may not have listened to her before, but they will now. Ooh, the old passive/aggressive Alana has returned! Cris tells Alana that she knows how to cook, so if she wants something else, she can make it herself.
Way to go with the leadership gig, Alana.
Now Alana and the other women start to realize that the guys have been doing everything around the camp, and they need to learn how to do it or they'll be in trouble. The guys say that they've tried to teach the women, but the women don't listen. Who needs to watch TV to hear this kind of debate --- many of us can hear it nightly in our own living rooms.
Alana stomps off to find firewood on her own but soon realizes that she has no idea what she's doing and sheepishly returns to a male-led "firewood training course." Nikki says that if all the men were voted off, the women would still get everything done. Maybe we'll get the chance to find out, Nikki!
Robin calls a meeting to bore everyone to death with his version of "leadership." He lectures the women to concentrate on keeping the home fires burning. So ... 35 years after the women's lib movement started, and this is all the more things have changed in faux celebrityland?
Melissa says that the crew wouldn't leave them without fire. Suddenly Michael Skupin shows up and tells them that he didn't think the crew would let him be incinerated, either ...
Next Robin wants to play doctor with the women. Nikki, take off your ... Oops, no, he just wants to make sure that they know how to use the medical kit. Even the calmer women get offended as Robin continues to talk down to them. In a confessional, Robin says that his talk went over their heads. In a separate confessional, Alana says that she wants to kill him. Now THAT would be a Bush Tucker Trial that I'd wanna see.
Finally, Robin tella everyone that they need to go to bed earlier and get up earlier. No one can figure out why, since they spend most of their day bored as it is. Nikki and even Robin's toady Melissa doze off as Robin drones on about how you can NOT can NOT can NOT can NOT eat undercooked chicken. Zzzzzzz.
Now it's Tyson's turn to lecture about how the women just need to do whatever needs to be done instead of asking first. At a lecture from girly man Tyson, both Maria and Alana draw the line. Tyson apologizes to Maria, but Alana starts crying. I guess she's gone too many days without seeing her shrink. It doesn't look like she'll win the high hurdles today.
Zzzzzzzz. Boy, this chattering is just such riveting drama. Come on, let's feed someone to the serpent!
In fact, it's time for Julie to join the serpents at the next Bush Tucker Trial. Robin mocks her comment on how hard these trials are. John tells her that they'll have spaghetti waiting when she get back, even if she doesn't do it.
OK, the trial is a snake pit. There are 10 stars inside the pit. The snake wrangler (what a great show -- we've had a croc wrangler, a bug wrangler, a possum wrangler, a leech wrangler and a snake wrangler. What's next: a worm wrangler?) tells her how to identify when a snake is ready to strike. This makes Julie feel very uncomfortable, and she says that she may be content with getting only one star.
Then we get to look at the snakes. Rats, no king browns (the most poisonous snake in the world). In fact, there are no aggressive or poisonous snakes at all. Too bad. However, it's hard to overcome your natural fear. You don't find many snakes "downtown." Well, except for the two-legged kind.
Julie gets three minutes to retrieve as many stars as she can. She gets one right away ... but stays in. In the first minute, she gets three. Two more in the next minute. Two more in the last minute. Seven stars in total, meaning seven meals for the happy fauxies, who welcome her back to camp enthusiastically.
Back in camp, we see Tyson working with Nikki to build a fire. The men start directing double entendres at Nikki. This passes for entertainment on ABC, but it would pass for sexual harrassment anywhere else.
The fauxies imitate each other. Bruce imitates a worried Alana, and even she laughs. Robin does John making a decision while in the bathroom. John does Robin, giving orders while sitting on his fat butt doing nothing. Nikki mocks Maria's accent and hand gestures. Cris does Tyson's Felix Unger tendencies. Finally, it's time to go LIVE.
John LIVE comes out to boot someone. One by one, he tells the fauxies that they're safe. The last two left are Bruce and Robin, who look completely stunned at the prospect that one of them is on his way out. And it's Robin, the first one booted from Eden on the orders of God ... or at least the orders of the American viewing public.
Everyone gives Robin a hug. They're sad that the pig has to leave his mudhole.
Back in the studio, Robin says that he was the backbone of the camp and that America voted him out to make everyone else suffer. In the interest of sparing Robin from further delusions, let's enlighten him now: you were the WHINER of the camp, Robin, and everyone hoped that the others would stop whining so much once you were gone. You were voted out so that no one else, in the camp or in the viewing audience, would have to suffer through your constant hectoring and complaining.
Robin's friend Charo shows up on videotape and says she's proud of him and loves him. Yeah, "coochie coochie" Charo would be the perfect person for Robin to be friends with, since he could talk condescendingly to her and she wouldn't be offended. Have some cheese with your whine, Robin.
LIVE pictures from camp show Alana and Julie talking and everyone else still in shock. The Grim Reaper of TV Oblivion will come for one of you tomorrow, so be ready. We are.