Britain's royal family learned a "very harsh lesson" about candidly dealing with the public in the days following Diana's death, a former aide says.

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The Queen's former assistant private secretary, Mary Francis, said in a BBC documentary it took a tragedy to make the royals realize they had to share their grief, the Mirror reported Monday.

Queen Elizabeth was in Scotland when the Princess of Wales died in a Paris crash and she came under fire for not returning to England and for failing to release an immediate statement, the tabloid said.

"I was standing behind her as the funeral procession came along," Francis said. I recall that she bowed. It was completely unexpected. But it was a wonderful gesture.

"I guess the royal family learned a very harsh lesson that week," she said, "that you have to communicate grief and you have to recognize other people are feeling that grief."