'Bachelorette' suitor Fred Greif talks about two-on-one date ouster
By Christopher Rocchio, 06/13/2008
When The Bachelorette fourth-season star DeAnna Pappas gave Robert Fair the boot during a two-on-one date, remaining suitor Fred Greif said he was optimistic.
"Obviously when Robert left I'm feeling pretty good. It kind of hits you like, 'Wow! There's going to be six guys left and I'm one of them. Things are going pretty good here and you're going to get an opportunity to know this person a little bit more,'" Greif told Reality TV World during a Thursday conference call. "That's pretty much what I was thinking, as you saw, my sigh of relief to still be there -- or at least I thought."
Greif's relief was short-lived because Pappas also decided to send the 30-year-old lawyer and teacher from Chicago, IL packing at the conclusion of the two-on-one date during Monday night's episode.
"Right when she sat down again, I just could tell something was a little off," explained Greif to Reality TV World. "I pretty much knew right there that she wasn't having the feelings about me that she felt she needed to keep me on the show. So pretty much when she sat down I kind of looked at her -- being around her for that time period, you get to know somebody -- and I could tell by her body language and stuff that it was going to be difficult for her. It wouldn't be difficult if she was just giving me a rose."
While Greif said he thought he and Pappas had "pretty good conversation" and "some interest on both sides," he reiterated his Monday night sentiments that he holds no ill will towards The Bachelorette star for his ouster.
"The one thing I will say about it is -- and I told her this from Day 1 and I touched on it briefly when I was on the date at the magic castle -- this show is about her. She's trying to find the person that's the best fit for her. Obviously I wanted to be in the mix there, and as I got to know her it would have been nice to see if we could have developed something together. But I do respect the fact that if she didn't see anything there between us, she didn't want to keep me around," Greif told Reality TV World.
"I have no bad feelings about that or anything. She was being honest. I appreciate that. I respect her for going back and going through this process again. I was there for four weeks, and it's not the easiest scenario to be in, but I definitely have no bad feelings. I respect her and I want it to be about her. I hope she finds it in someone on the show."
Greif added he also doesn't regret his decision to not put himself out there as quickly as some of Pappas' other suitors.
"I just didn't feel right away I could jump in there and say, 'I'm in love with you DeAnna.' That's just not how it works, how I am with people," he told reporters during the conference call. "I didn't think that would be fair to her, so I waited. We had a good conversation, it didn't work out. But that's okay and I really don't have any regrets."
"I was standing outside on a Sunday night and I usually don't go out on Sunday night -- me and my buddy just decided to go out and have a steak. I was standing outside a restaurant Sunday night about 10:30 and a woman walked by me and said, 'Excuse me sir, you seem like a nice-looking guy, fun. Would you consider going out forThe Bachelorette?'" Greif told Reality TV World.
"At first I said, 'I'm very flattered, but no. I don't watch the show or anything.' She just said why don't you come for an interview. One thing led to another and the next thing I know I was out in L.A. doing the show. It's kind of been like a whirlwind."
Unlike some of Pappas' other suitors, Greif said he never watched her get rejected twice by Brad Womack during The Bachelor's eleventh season last fall.
"I didn't see it at all. I had no idea," he told Reality TV World. "Even when they first asked me about DeAnna, I said, 'I'm sorry, I don't know what happened. I didn't watch that.'"
So after he was cast Greif said he "did a little research on the Internet" to learn about Pappas.
"Of course I wanted to know the person a little bit, who I'd be meeting," he explained. "I wasn't disappointed. She was a great individual."
Being a Chicago native and a fan of the Cubs -- a baseball franchise that hasn't won a title in 99 years and counting -- Greif told Reality TV World that fait played a role in how he approached the show.
"I wasn't just going in, 'I'm going to find a wife.' I'm a big fait guy, I believe in this fait stuff -- I guess being a Cub fan, you need that a little bit," he said. "I believe that stuff and I was thinking, 'Maybe there's a reason I was out Sunday night when I never go out, standing there and someone approached me about it. Maybe I could really develop something with this person.' I saw her and she just had that way about her. She was funny, she was definitely cute -- and I like brunettes too. I thought it would maybe be something that could work out."
However viewers didn't see much of Greif during the first few episodes and immediately thought he might have fallen into the dreaded "friend zone."
"My relationship with DeAnna, it started off that we were having a lot of fun together. When we would talk we would laugh, we would share those moments. There were times when I would think to myself, 'Her interest is in certain people and it's a tough process.' But there were also those moments where I thought when me and her were talking, 'It could possibly be me,'" he told reporters.
"It was just a situation I wasn't familiar with how to handle -- with 25 other guys there, and I had to take it slow. I wasn't just going to dive in right away. I wanted to get to know her a little bit, and if that put me in the 'friend zone,' I guess maybe it did. But the bottom line is I wanted to make sure and be fair to her that I was having those feelings for her as well."
Once Greif did receive some alone time with Pappas when he was picked to live with her in the mansion for a week, things didn't exactly go according to plan.
"The thing that really wasn't a big advantage when I was up there in the mansion because of the one night she had the date with Jesse, and that went really late. Then we had the barbecue, and you saw how that went," he said. "So it wasn't as big of an advantage as I thought it would be to be up in that mansion during the time I spent there."
Despite the fact that there's only six suitors left, Greif said he thinks one could also be a member of the "friend zone."
"I think Twilley could be there. I really do think Twilley could be in the friend zone a little bit," he said. "I've been on a couple group dates with Twilley and the sparks didn't really seem to fly between DeAnna and him at all. But that's just in a group setting. I don't know individually when they had one-on-one time what had happened. But that could be someone who falls into that category a little bit."
Greif was also asked to offer his opinion on Jeremy, who has raised the ire of several other suitors by showing that he has no problem in being competitive to win her heart.
"I didn't have the time to spend with him as these other people. I don't want to make judgements on people because he was up there [in the mansion] twice and I was down in the outhouse, and when I got up to the mansion he went down," said Greif. "I really wasn't concerned with him to be honest with you. I was more concerned with DeAnna and how things were going with her."
Still, Greif said he noticed Jeremy would "say things that were directly meant for the camera that didn't need to be said."
"The helicopter's landing, and the guy trying to land the helicopter pushes us back. The guy says, 'Just make sure you guys all stand back,'" recalled Greif. "I was standing right next to [Jeremy], and he goes, 'Well I'll stand back, but if DeAnna goes out there, nothing's going to stop me from saving her.' Just something like that. It doesn't seem too natural... I could see where some of the guys based on those comments would be like, 'Just be yourself bud.'"
Greif said he'd like to see Pappas end up with his former "bunk buddy" Jason, a single dad who has become one of the front runners in recent weeks.
"Jason was my bunk guy in the outhouse the first couple of weeks. I really think that he's a quality individual," said Greif. "He's a single dad and he would talk about his son -- he thinks the world about his son Ty. That's something that I really respect him for. I just think that he's a very good, standup guy. So he would probably be my pick."
Greif said he hasn't dated since the show stopped filming but hopes the experience can come in handy once he does so.
"I hope it helps. I hope it helps a little bit. I think it might help, maybe people got to know me a little bit," he said. "Certainly when you start dating again it's going to be a little easier because you'll be one-on-one with somebody at dinner -- not with 25 other guys. If I can handle that, I can get back in there and date a girl alright I hope."
In addition, Greif said he would "definitely consider" a stint as The Bachelor should ABC come calling.
"This was definitely a new experience for me, but I think it was a good experience," he said. "I was proud of the way I handled myself and I met some good, quality people on the show. The people there were terrific. I would definitely consider doing it."