A new season of The Bachelor has begun. Can you feel the excitement? One can almost smell the spoilers in the air waiting to be discovered. The show begins with Chris, our trusty Bachelor host asking Andrew if he’s ready for tonight to begin. We’re all ready. I’m so filled with suspense that I can hardly wait for the first limo to roll up.
Without further ado, lets introduce this seasons bachelorettes’ all of whom are the mercy of Survivorblows loyalists:
The first limo slowly rolls up to the curve and out comes:
#1 Tina P. Age 22 Hometown: Oconomowoc, WI Memorable trait? It looked like her cheek was going to pop out of her mouth. Quote: "I’d let the guy watch football with friends, give them beer and food then leave and let them party hard. That’s why I’d be the perfect wife” My first thought after hearing this was: Oh dear lord, this is just the first girl. How I am going to survive the next 24 after this one just set the womens movement about 20 years or so?
#2 Liz Age: 23 Hometown: Chicago, IL Event planning Director She’s wearing a red dress with a faux train on it that I don’t quite get. I should be Mrs. Firestone because: This is the ultimate matchmaker. Some one out there thinks I could be perfect for him.” Spare me please....on to:
#3 Elizabeth Age: 24 Hometown: Bolingbrook, IL Child Life Specialist Her sigh of relief to the camara was really: A.) To swat the swarm of flies that was attracted to hair spray away OR B.) To ward off the evil eye from the other bachlorettes
#4 StephanieAge 21, Hometown: Mt. Pleasant, TN Occupation: Hostess A southern belle with long blonde hair. The southern part is immediately confirmed when she speaks. Sugar, looks like the beauty pageant thing didn't help you win Mr. Firestone's heart.
#5 Christina C Age: 30 Hometown: Montclair, NJ Pharmaceutical Sales Consultant The types of drugs shes are: A. Love Potion #9 B. Viagra C. Smart Pills-To make me seem smarter then I really am The first thing that comes to mind with her is that she’s the kind of girl you really want to hate because she’s so beautiful, but can’t because she’s so nice. Most honest comment of the night: I want a husband, kids the whole nine yards. And I wasn’t allowed to wear make-up until I was 17, and couldn’t date till I was 18. Kissing a boy in front of a camera will be rough.
#6 Christina Age:24 Hometown: Palm Harbor, FL Realtor, Make-up Artist The thing that caught my eye about her was that when she stepped out of the limo, it seemed to be in slow motion, and a different kind of romantic music came on, but then again maybe I’ve just been spoiling too much.
#7 Virginia/Ginny Age: 25 Hometown: Kansas City, Mo Waitress/Law Student "I’m going to be the bachelor’s Ms. Right." And since I didn't get rose, I am now going to sue ABC's pants off once I get my law degree.