This week’s summary of The Bachelor is interactive! There are a bunch of questions in the summery... read and answer as many as you like. There are no right answers. Here’s your first question.
1) Deb is currently:
a. At work, trying to get her summary done. b. At work, getting hungry and wondering where the food she ordered is. c. Wishing she was at home, in her jammies. d. All of the above.
As we open this week's episode, we get Megan confessing she feels like a looser again. So here's our second question.
2) Megan is:
a. Not a looser. Clearly, the producers told her "We'll give you one on one time with Charlie if you'll dye your hair blond." b. Still a looser- she dyed it anyway just to be alone with Charlie. c. Not a looser... she made a smoking hot blond. d. Who cares? She's gone now.
Kimberley goes through her luggage to find the ideal outfit for her date for Charlie. She lets us know she is stepping it up for the date. We actually get to see her pearl thong. Having been the victim of the occasional wedgie myself, I think "ow." Kim shows off her custom made bustier and um, skirt. Then we get a shot of Charlie twirling the phone around, which promptly falls to the floor. I laugh, out loud. Kimberley speculates there will be dinner and dancing. Charlie calls to tell her that they are going to an art gallery. He tells us that he and art are thisclose, holding up two fingers. Charlie then makes me laugh out loud again by stating that nothin' says lovin like three floors of art. So here's question number three.
3) Charlie is:
a. A big, big doofus. b. Kind of funny looking. c. Not the smartest man in the world. d. All of the above.
Jenny and Anitra take Kimberley aside and tell her the bustier is a big no-no at an art gallery. Kimberley listens to them and says maybe she'll change and maybe she won't. It turns out she does change. Her outfit is now a mini dress with a jacket over it. Kimmie, some words of wisdom for you... if I had a gap in between my oobies the size of the Grand Canyon, I'd probably emphasize my legs and downplay my oobies. Her legs do look good in the skirt. Charlie remarks upon seeing Kim, "Wow. Now we're cooking (pause) with gas." They make really, really inane comments about art that I refuse to recap because it makes my brain hurt. Wackiness ensues as we learn that Charlie has put some of his little kid art in the gallery. Oh, the hilarity! Even Kim, who seems about as intelligent as Charlie, figures out that the art she's looking at could have been done by a little kid. Then Charlie smoothly (or not) offers to show Kim where he lives. Of course she agrees. She wants to show off a few more of the... tricks... she showed him in the bathroom on the last episode.
We find out, back at the prison-o-bachlorettes that the girls have taken out the clothes in Kim's suitcase and are parading around in them. They all look pretty good. Kara, working the school girl look complete with pig tails, looks amazingly hot. Sarah W. appears to be no where in site though. Perhaps she's knitting somewhere. Kindle, Anitra and Jenny reapply their make up and it suddenly occurs to them that it's getting late and Kim isn't home. And scary guy hasn't remove her luggage. So they speculate as to what she and Charlie are doing. Anitra claims they could be having stimulating conversation which the other girls deny.
And we witness the stimulating conversation. Kim rubs her foot on the back of Charlie's knee and adjusts his shirt. She makes some comment about wanting to see what kind of guy his is. And Charlie gives her the rose and tells her he hopes they can continue to get to know each other. They end up on the bed, which Kim tells him is bouncy, and make out.
Back at the Kim Wear show, the Krisily snits that she bets Kim is at Charlie's. Kara says she wouldn't want to date Charlie after Kim's test drove him overnight. Anitra calls him, and a very tired sounding Charlie tells her Kim is on the way home. So he confirms to all of them that she was at his place. Someone wonders aloud if Kim slept with Charlie. I was trying to judge what happened, and I'm thinking by the glow on his face and the fact that she licked her lips a little there was some Joe Millionare in the woods action going on, if you know what I mean.
Kim tells all the girls around in the morning that she went to Charlie's and he has tons of pictures. Ready for another question?
4) Now that Kim has seen everyone parading around in her clothes....
a. She will burn the ones that Krisily wore. b. She will be jealous of how smokin hot Kara looked in her clothes. c. She really won't care- they're all just jealous of her time with Charlie. d. She was satisfied by the bribe ABC paid her to not care. e. All of the above.
The group date is bowling. Having used a "Gosh I don't know how to shoot pool" as an excuse to get a hot guy to wrap his arms around me... I note Sarah W.'s "Gosh I don't know how to bowl" technique. Charlie falls for it. Soon he's spending all his time with Sarah W., which draws the ire of all of the other girls. Sarah claims that the other girls know he's hers. Krisily tells us the W. stands for Wicked, Witch, (not Worm) and Weasel. Charlie sits with everyone and tells them he and Kim made out, and Sarah W. tries to act all understanding, which is total BS.
5) After Sarah W. finds out Kim got to make out with Charlie
a. She performs a complicated ritual with her knitting needles and a voodoo doll Kim. b. She wishes she had flushed Kim's custom made corset down the toilet. c. She stabs Charlie's picture a few times with her knitting needles. d. She has a long conversation with her knitting about Charlie. e. All of the above.
Krisily goes off to chat with Charlie, where he gives her the ”I think we’ll be friends” speech. Which probably isn’t a brush off since he apparently has no clue what he’s looking for. The two Sarah’s have a drunken conversation where Sarah W tells the other Sarah that Charlie told her who the final four are going to be, naming herself, Jenny, Kim, and Krisily. Sarah B is visably upset by this. We cut in back at the bachlorette ranch, and Kim and Kara are having a conversation about what Kara should wear on her date with Charlie. Kim advises her to show some skin because guys like it. Well, of course they do. They remark the group date is running late. We go back to the group date as Charlie gives his rose to Sarah B. Which is very entertaining because Sarah W looks angry.
Back at the bachlorette house, Kara gets a call from Charlie telling her he is too tired to go out with her. She then gets some flowers, which were so obviously sent to her by a producer. Hey, at least she got some lovely flowers out of it. She gets a call the next day from Charlie telling her they are going ice skating in Central Park. I wonder what Kim would have worn to ice skate. I’m guessing something short and too tight for her, Kara is really excited about it. They skate, as two strategically placed kids skate by them. Charlie races one kid and looses. As the snow falls, they sit on a bench and chat. You can tell that Charlie is going to cut her, and sure enough, he tells her he’s not going to give her a rose. Kara tells her daughter she won’t settle for anything less than the best for the both of them.
Scary hat man takes Kara’s luggage as the girls pretend to be disappointed. Anitra tells us it was a huge reality check for her. And I’m not sure why- she saw Meghan’s luggage removed last week.
Charlie calls his better looking and more famous brother Jerry, and they share a few moments of dialogue. Charlie tells him there were some psycho girls in the beginning. Jerry gives him the advice to not jump in any hot tubs.
6) That segment....
a. Was lame. That’s it? b. Was exciting. Jerry’s hot. c. Was hyped more than it should have been. d. Who cares? It’s over.
And now finally to the rose ceremony. Anitra asks why Kim and Sarah B both have roses, as they are both very different. Charlie tells them he doesn’t know what he’s looking for. As shown in the previews Jenny tells Charlie she’s smart and pretty and funny and has been overlooked. Jenny may be a lovely girl, but her 80’s prom dress reject is not. That dress should be grounds for her elimination. Jenny also says she doesn’t dress like that, and points to Kim, or act like that, and points to Sarah W. Sarah then lamely says she doesn’t know what they mean when she is accused of having a passive agressive personality. Charlie gives roses to Krisily, Anitra, Sarah W, and Kindle. He tells Jenny she’s a great girl, but he doesn’t think they are right together. If you look carefully, you’ll notice that Anitra is wearing the same top that Krisily wore last week. Anitra makes it look more substantial.
Jenny cries in her confession that she feels like a loser, and the camera weirdly pans to her running away and then to the elevator descending.
Anitra tries to tell Sarah W that she should be upset at Jenny’s parting shot at her. Krisily jumps down her throat for being so passive. Why you want to start a start a fight at the rose ceremony? Seems like the fastest way to get eliminated, with the exception of Krisily.
7) And Krisily...
a Is a producer's pick. b. Likes getting in the face of the girl who she thinks is ahead at this point. c. Is a little nutty. d. All of the above.
The last shots of the episode are of the girls, who go out the night that Charlie is tired. They seem to drink, and dance with guys, and have a good time. All except poor misunderstood Sarah W. Next week... Sarah W and Krisily fight, some more!