Cupid - Episode 11 Summary

'The Way They Were' By Schnookie Palookie

Our favorite host, Spike McFayden, is all spiffed up in a black suit with satin lapels. However, true to his name, Spike has brought his “spikes” to an all-time high. Does he not realize that in order to get the “Ryan Seacrest / Clay Aiken” look, you need to spike ALL YOUR HAIR and not just the middle part so it looks like a Mohawk??!! Spike is cute and I find his cutting remarks hilarious but DUDE, do something with the hair. I need to write a summary and your hair is too damn distracting!

Ok enough of that, on with the show. First, we are shown a rehash of some of the auditions, which were a hoot and the best part of the whole show! Who can forget Wooden Sword Guy fighting with Laura, Grampa Gladiator being a perv, Cherub Boy being a child, Hillbilly Guy with his Barbie doll, Tattoo Boy with his skateboard and Porno Guy. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh the memories.

"Hey Ma ... look who I'm gonna marry"

Next, Spike welcomes back the six booted guys … Rob, Scott, Paul, Ken, Joe and Renda, then the four finalists … Evan, Hank, Robert and Dominic. All the guys were dressed in black suits with bow ties. Laura and Kimberly were dressed in lovely black evening dresses. Wow, Kimberly is wearing something nice for a change. Lastly, Lisa comes out on stage wearing a beautiful white wedding dress, which really looked like an evening gown, but she looked Classy! It was cute seeing Lisa nervously giggling.

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THE BACHELOR HOUSE:
This show is all about the memories, so the guys reminisce about the most recently shafted guy, Renda. Dom must have gotten rap lessons from Robert, judging by his lame rap attempt for Renda … "Yo yo Renda, it was fun spenda time with you." Yo Yo Dom! Save the rap for the professionals. Next we see them having a ping pong competition. Whoever wins gets Lisa. First up were Evan and Dom. Evan puts a tie around his forehead and has no shirt on. If it weren't for the stupid tie, I'd say Evan was looking pretty good. Despite his warrior headband, Evan lost. We then see Hank and Robert compete. Hank wins by 2 points (YIPPEE!!). They then decided to have a mock-wedding. Evan presided over the ceremony while Dom played Lisa and Robert played Hank. Hank sat by watching all this, slightly amused. When it was time to kiss, Dom and Rob put up their ping-pong paddles in front of their faces and kissed them. Evan then walked over to Hank and pressed his hands heavily down onto Hank's shoulders and said "Feel that? Its called pressure." Hank is starting to look a little afraid, or he just wasn't amused.

MEMORIES:
Laura and Kimberly were then asked for their final vote on who should be the guy to marry Lisa and they both said Hank. Man, Spike's hair is really distracting. I can hardly concentrate on the show.

We then go on a trip down memory lane by watching the four finalists' past dating experience's with Lisa.

Dom got me in a singing mood so here we go ….

(sung to the tune “The Way We Were” by B. Streisand).

"Memories…
Darken corners of my mind
Mostly sad and painful memories
Of the way they were

Sniffing panties,
Mirrored-shoes and crying tears,
How can I erase the memories?
Of the way they were

Can it be that Dom’s not ready to wed?
Will Evan learn to skate on ice?
If we have the chance to watch it all again,
Tell me, would we? Should we?

Memories, I just can't seem to forget
Roving hands and heated kisses
Is this something Hank will regret?
Sooooooooo it’s the laughter,
I’ll try to remember
Whenever I remember …
The way they were...
The way they were..."

Each of the guys made some comments during the video clips:

Robert: He thinks he’s the best choice for Lisa. (Man that guy's so delusional)
Dom: He says there’s a connection so his age shouldn’t matter.
Hank: He is looking forward to exploring life with Lisa. (Among other things "wink wink"
Evan: He says Lisa is the best choice for him.

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