'The Bachelorette' star DeAnna Pappas discusses rejected bachelors
By Christopher Rocchio, 07/03/2008
Despite being in their shoes only less than a year ago when she was attempting to woo Brad Womack, The Bachelorette star DeAnna Pappas admits she anticipated receiving more attention from her fourth-season suitors.
"Sometimes I wonder if I didn't expect too much out of them," she told Reality TV World during a Wednesday conference call. "But as soon as I start to think that, I look back and I'm like, 'Honestly, 25 guys came to date me. I shouldn't have to fight in that process to make any of them fall for me. If it was meant to be, it would happen. I shouldn't have had to stand around and cry a thousand times to show them that it was hurting me that they ignored me when I was in a room."
But Pappas said she also recognized that the women who fought for Womack with her and the men who battled it out for her affection are two totally dissimilar animals.
"Guys and girls are totally different," she told Reality TV World. "When I was on the show and we were with Brad and he walked into a room we were goo-goo, gah-gah over him. With the guys, they're so buddy-buddy, you go down to the house for a barbecue and they don't care. They're going to play cornhole and whatever else -- whether you're there or not. They're just guys, they can't help it."
"I tried my hardest to be as open and brutally honest as possible because I don't ever want any of those guys to leave and still be confused as to why it didn't work out between us," she told reporters during the conference call about how she approached the special.
"So although some things may seem harsh, I think all those guys can say they understand where we didn't work out. I never wanted anyone to feel like I felt."
One suitor who was still confused after filming the special was Jeremy Anderson, who was ousted after telling Pappas he was in love with her.
"I knew I didn't feel the same," she told reporters.
Still, Anderson subsequently told reporters during his post-elimination interview that he felt like he was being led on by Pappas. While Anderson tried to confront Pappas about his concerns during The Men Tell All, he claims she brushed off his inquiries.
"It's never easy seeing anyone that you've broken up with. It's never easy. There's always going to be unanswered questions and things that people don't understand -- especially if you're the one that got broken up with and especially in this situation where there's cameras and other people around and it's on national television," Pappas told reporters.
"You always second guess and wish you had said something or not said something. Me being in Jeremy's position before, of course it was hard to see him at The Men Tell All, of course it was hard to know that I broke his heart and he felt led on. That doesn't make anyone feel good."
Pappas also described Anderson as "perfect" on more than one occasion during the season, a comment she reiterated when speaking to reporters that also offered some insight into why he was cut.
"He's the perfect man -- I mean you heard me say it all season long," she said. "He's perfect, and I'm scared to death of perfect. I've never had that in my life."
While it didn't work out between the two of them, Pappas said she would support Anderson if he were to one day be in her shoes.
"Jeremy would make a great [The Bachelor star] because he has everything to offer a woman. Jeremy has everything to offer," she said. "He has a wonderful outlook on life and love, he comes from an amazing family, has a great career ahead of him. If he wanted to be the next Bachelor [star], I would totally support him... I wish him the best in love for the future. But I don't necessarily think that Jeremy's hurting for a date."
Another suitor who clashed with Pappas during The Men Tell All was Graham Bunn, who was somewhat surprisingly rejected due to the physical chemistry and instant attraction he had with her. But despite that, Pappas reiterated to reporters that he simply wasn't willing to open himself up fast enough in the situation he was in.
"I know with Graham, he has made it perfectly clear that he opened up the best he could. I completely appreciate that," she told reporters.
"But that just shows you that Graham and I are not meant to be. I could not continue to go on and beg him to open up to me and beg him to fall in love with me. It's not a normal dating situation. We don't have our entire lives for him to see if he can spend forever with me. We had six weeks, and if he couldn't do that, than it just simply wasn't meant to be because I had 24 other guys who were willing to do that."
After Bunn was booted, he handed Pappas a hand-written letter that made her second guess her decision to eliminate him.
"It was just a really nice note," said Pappas about the letter. "It was just Graham telling me his feelings for me and just expressing that he felt very lucky to have met me and I would always hold a special place in his heart and he was hoping that we could always be friends."
Although she initially questioned her decision, Pappas retracted the statement during The Men Tell All special and added the punctuation mark when speaking with reporters.
"I definitely have no regrets," she said. "It simply solidifies the fact that Graham and I are not meant to be together. If any viewers had any questions about that, hopefully it made things clearer for them as well. Graham's Graham and I'm who I am. Yeah, we did butt heads. But we did have a lot of things that we clearly understood about each other as well."
Pappas added she wishes "the best" for Bunn.
"He's a good person," she said. "I pray that someday he lets someone in because I do believe that he is a wonderful man and he has a lot to offer someone. It was good to see him again. We've talked, we will be friends."
Overall, Pappas told reporters it's been enjoyable for her to watch as The Bachelorette's fourth season unfolds.
"It's so much fun watching the episodes air because if I wasn't in the room, I didn't see it happen," she explained. "So the fun stuff the guys do -- them working out or them sitting around the campfire talking to each other -- I didn't get to see any of that. So it's fun for me and it's new for me as well. Sometimes I don't know exactly how they feel, so when I see it in their personal interviews, it makes things a little easier for me to understand."
Pappas said watching the season has also "clarified things" with all of the bachelors.
"Just to see how people truly feel if they couldn't open up to me and couldn't say things," she continued. "So watching it, especially with Graham, he would say he cares about me but he could never bring himself to tell me face-to-face how he felt. It just shows you that everything happens for a reason. Things are meant to be just the way they're meant to be."
Pappas said she feels good about how she was portrayed as The Bachelorette star and has "no regrets."
"I'm myself -- good or bad -- I am myself 100%," she said. "I'm very proud to say that."