Married at First Sight star Katie Conrad says she became increasingly less attracted to her husband Derek Sherman as she got to know him better while filming the show.
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"Derek being such a dreamer worries me a little bit, because I want a man. I don't want a little boy who's dreaming and writing Christmas songs," Katie told the cameras in a recent episode, adding how she wanted Derek's priorities to be his wife and raising kids.
During the March 18 broadcast of Married at First Sight: Unfiltered, host Jamie Otis got to the bottom of why Katie had such an issue with Derek being a dreamer.
"Katie, are you attracted to your husband and are all of his traits attractive to you? And you can be honest," Jamie asked.
"Oh, I'll be honest," Katie replied. "I'll be honest."
"Initially, I was attracted to him," continued Katie, who called Derek "so cute" as well as "tall dark and handsome" on their wedding day.
"But I feel like the more I get to know his personality, the less attracted I am to him."
Katie has also complained on Married at First Sight's tenth season about how Derek discusses his bathroom habits too often.
"What is it that is so unattractive to you?" Jamie asked.
"I think his dreamerness is a little bit of a turnoff for me. I want somebody who can be, like, more down to earth and more realistic," Katie explained.
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Katie's Married at First Sight co-star Zach Justice joined Katie on Unfiltered and offered his two cents on the topic.
"In Katie's defense, I think she has a vision of what a man and his ideas and his dreams look like. And I think how Derek comes across is just very kid-like in every element," Zach reasoned.
"When you're talking about kids and starting a family, these [dreams] sound crazy."
Married at First Sight expert Pastor Calvin Roberson, however, read deeper into Katie's concerns.
"Oh, Katie," Pastor Cal began.
"Let me have it," Katie joked.
"I don't think it's a matter of whether his dreams are realistic or unrealistic," Pastor Cal suggested. "I think there's something else that you don't like."
Katie joked that Pastor Cal was in "full therapy mode," and he agreed he wanted to dive in past the surface of the problem.
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"Okay," Katie conceded.
"Am I right?" Pastor Cal asked.
"I would agree," Katie responded.
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"It's a little intimidating when somebody has so many other things they want to do. If we're going to have a marriage and a family and we're settled down, is that going to be too settled down for you? Are you always going to want more?"
Pastor Cal understood where Katie was coming from and acknowledged she was concerned whether Derek would be able to be a stable husband and father for her family.
"To his credit, he has a very stable job and he's doing relatively well. He has a baseline of stability," Pastor Cal pointed out.
"I'm still hopeful," Katie noted. "I still want this to work. I definitely think we have a lot to work on, and I'd like to see us last beyond 'Decision Day.'"
Jamie concluded she was also hopeful for the future of Katie and Derek's relationship.
Prior to "Recommitment Day," Katie and Derek had an explosive argument over his long list of dreams.
"I feel like your dreams to you are more than this marriage and you clearly don't have any f-cking idea what you want, so I'm done having this conversation. Let me know when you figure out what you do want!" Katie shouted before closing herself into a bedroom.
Derek told the cameras he had every intention of achieving all of his dreams and the fact Katie didn't think he's capable of doing so "really stung."
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"I don't want a marriage with you if I don't get any dreams. I want to have a marriage with you where I can at least do some of my dreams, because you're supposed to be a part of my dreams. If that's not good enough, I don't know what I can do," Derek told Katie.
Katie snapped at Derek to "be a f-cking grown up," and so he gave up on the conversation and slept on the couch.
Katie didn't think they were on the same page, and she said these problems were building ontop of her initial fear that Derek would never fall in love with her.
"I don't feel secure with making a family with someone like that... and I don't think I ever will be," Katie told the cameras.
However, Katie and Derek chose to stay together and work through their problems on "Recommitment Day" during the latest episode of Married at First Sight.
Dr. Viviana Coles advised Katie to "fake it until you make it" and at least pretend to support Derek's dreams because spouses should be each other's No. 1 fan. And Pastor Cal asked Derek to embrace the great things he already has in life and prove to Katie that she's his first priority.
Viviana told Katie she should want a fun relationship and she and Derek could have an excellent balance in their marriage given Katie is more of a grounded individual.
When the pair reunited, Katie apologized for shutting down on Derek and explained she was just worried a life with her wouldn't be enough for him.
"I'll always be chasing an adventure, but to me, the greatest adventure is what we're doing," Derek told his wife. "And that adventure doesn't end."
Katie promised to be more encouraging going forward and added, "I won't make fun of your Christmas song. I'll do the cowbell."
Married at First Sight, which currently airs on Wednesday nights at 8PM ET/PT on Lifetime, also stars Mindy Shiben, Taylor Dunklin, Brandon Reid, Austin Hurd, Jessica Studer, Meka Jones, and Michael Watson.
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About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski
