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Holly Madison reveals she contemplated suicide while living in 'Playboy' Mansion


By Elizabeth Kwiatkowski, 03/25/2015 

Holly Madison has revealed she went through a very dark time in her life when she was actively involved in the Playboy lifestyle.

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A press release for Madison's new tell-all memoir called Down the Rabbit Hole obtained by People revealed some shocking details about how the former Holly's World and The Girls Next Door star considered killing herself while she was living in the Playboy Mansion.

"What seemed like a fairy tale life inside the Playboy Mansion -- including A-list celebrity parties and her own No. 1-rated television show for four years -- quickly devolved into an oppressive routine of strict rules, manipulation and battles with ambitious, backstabbing bunnies," read the press release.

Down the Rabbit Hole, which will be released June 23, documents how Madison, 35, was fairly miserable being one of Hugh Hefner's Playboy bunnies.

"Life inside the notorious Mansion wasn't a dream at all -- and quickly became her nightmare," the press release continued. "After losing her identity, her sense of self-worth, and her hope for the future, Holly found herself alone in a bathtub contemplating suicide."

Madison was known to be Hefner's main girlfriend in the mansion for quite some time. She and the 88-year-old Playboy founder and editor-in-chief split in Fall 2008 after they determined they wanted different things out of their relationship. Madison desired to get married and have children, while Hefner was hesitant to wed again after two failed marriages.

However, Hefner ended up tying the knot with 28-year-old Playmate Crystal Harris in 2012 on New Year's Eve.

Madison and her husband Pasquale Rotella, a music festival producer, began dating in 2011. They welcomed a baby girl named Rainbow Aurora in March 2013, got engaged in June, and then went on to wed in early September of that same year.

Holly's World, originally titled Planet Holly, first premiered in December 2009 as a one-off special. However, its impressive ratings led E! to order an eight-episode season which debuted in June 2010.

The network premiered a second season of Holly's World in January 2011, but the series was canceled after the second season concluded in April of that year.



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