Chad Johnson is finally being vulnerable in the public eye, revealing that his bad behavior on television actually stems from deep emotional grief.

In a preview clip for the upcoming episode of Famously Single, Chad, 29, opens up to Dr. Darcy Sterling about how the death of his mother contributed to his violent and macho antics on both JoJo Fletcher's season of The Bachelorette and last summer's edition of Bachelor in Paradise.

As fans may recall, Chad's mother passed away about six months before he appeared on Season 12 of The Bachelorette in 2016 when he became known for threatening other men or punching walls in fits of anger.

When Dr. Sterling asks if he ever had a chance to really mourn his mother's death in the clip, Chad replies, "I don't know. I don't know if I ever really did."

"And then they made me the bad guy," Chad says of the ABC franchise. "I mean, they didn't make me -- I made me."

On Bachelor in Paradise's third season, Chad told most of his castmates he wanted to murder them, and he got so drunk that he nearly fought his only friend Daniel Maguire and passed out on the beach. Chad was forced to leave the show after swearing at multiple women and calling Sarah Herron a "one-armed b-tch."

Chad admits his over-the-top bravado and villainous persona served as a great distraction from having to mourn the loss of his mom, the most important person in his life.

"I couldn't think about it," Chad recalls. "All I could think about was, 'Did I ruin my life?'"

Chad says in the preview clip for Famously Single's Sunday, July 2 episode he was "so worried" about how people might perceive him on The Bachelorette.

"Sometimes I go on a show and people see me as this jerk who's defensive or who is kind of standoffish, but it's like, I don't like letting new people in that easy because I don't want to lose someone again like that," Chad confides to Dr. Sterling.

"I know that that's my mother and she was sick," Chad says, noting how the loss of his mother is on a whole different level from his relationship with friends or acquaintances, "but I feel like a lot of people take too many chances of being too open too easily, and I don't really do that."

So in order to never feel the pain of that loss again, Chad apparently avoids putting himself in a position to get close to people entirely.

"I do [want to be in a relationship]," Chad confirms in the clip. "But I sometimes tend to back away or in some way, sabotage it, because I think I'm afraid of hurting them. Because what happens if we got married and then we had to break up?"

Dr. Sterling then points out that Chad has a fear of doing to his future wife what his father had done to his mother.

"My hope is that you're going to meet somebody. At worst, somebody who will be a great friend for life and at best, maybe a lifelong partner," counsels Dr. Sterling. "But you're never going to know if you don't close your eyes and jump. You have to try."

Since Famously Single filmed, Chad apparently has found love! The former luxury real estate agent from Tulsa, OK, revealed to Entertainment Tonight in early June he had been dating a model named Zoe Baron for several months.

Famously Single's second season currently airs on Sunday nights at 10PM ET/PT on E!.
About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski
Elizabeth Kwiatkowski is Associate Editor of Reality TV World and has been covering the reality TV genre for more than a decade.