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American Dream Derby - Episode 2 Summary

'Shoot Me or Smoke Me' By realitybites
Original Airdate: January 10, 2005

another look at their horses. So there's plenty of time for confessionals:

Susan was miffed because Avenueofknowledge stumbled and if he hadn't done that, he would've won. Well, maybe or maybe not.

Jewel noted that Deanna is a marked woman.

LeVar didn't much care for Dean betting on Avenueofknowledge instead of the stable hands' horse.

Steve comes back and tells us about today's OWNERS' CHALLENGE. The contestants race out of the gate, one at a time, half a furlong (110 yards) down the Santa Anita stretch. As you'd expect, the young guys did best, with Chris' 13.43 seconds best of all. It looks like he's the lead owner for today.

But wait! Hold everything! Steve introduces us to "John" the handicapper. John doesn't break knees or elbows, he determines the weights for horses in handicap races at Santa Anita. And he's going to do the same for us, kinda sort of. He asked them about their exercise and diet habits and some other little things.

Since Susan and Jewel were packin' enough poundage already, they didn't get any added weight.
Sara was given 10 extra pounds and both Taras hauled 15 pounds.
Dean's the oldest, heaviest contestant who's had two knee surgerys and survived a heart attack. He got 20 pounds.
Deanna got 30 and she let everyone know she didn't like that.
Aaron was weighed down with 90 pounds, LeVar and Eric were burdened with 100 lbs each, and poor Chris gets to lug around 120 big ones.

This time they all go into the gate together, separate gates for each of them. And this time the first to the finish line wins the challenge. And they're off! Third place went to Tara. Second place was taken by Eric. And the winner was... Dean. Nice job. He picks Jewel, LeVar, and Chris to join him in the big house. One wonders if he had any regrets once he watched this episode...

Everyone else goes to the stable. Aaron tries to forge an alliance with Deanna while staying connected with Susan. Is this the sort of stuff they pull on those sit-and-scheme shows? I don't watch them, so I don't know. I expect him to anoint himself the Chessmaster of this game at any time.

Meanwhile, the owners celebrate their victory by having a nice meal in one of Santa Anita's luxury boxes (I think?). They agree to ally - for now, and they talk smack about Susan.

And Susan talks about... Deanna. She says that her rival is too powerful, so she has to go. Yeah, keep racking up those brownie points, Susie. See where it gets you.

Now we go to Santa Anita's walking ring, where the jockeys get on their horses for each race and the crowd gets one last look at the horses before they go into the gate. Alex tells them a little more about the horses and how to identify them.

Speaking of which, identifying horses is part of the STABLE HAND CHALLENGE. The stable hands get to a) dunk their faces into a mixture of oats and chocolate to find a nameplate - kinda like bobbing for apples, but kinda not, b) race over to the horses' stalls, c) put the correct names on the correct stalls, and d) push a button. The best time that identifies all three horses correctly wins. The last three steps are very reminiscent of "The Price Is Right"'s Race Game, which used to be on GSN a few years ago. Tara C. ran the race in a decent 1:11. Sara followed with :58 - excellent, for a model. None of the other people could beat her time (Susan was especially slow) until Aaron turned a time of 53 seconds. So he's the leader of this group of losers for now.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, LeVar is lovin' the big house, especially the kitchen. Jewel enjoyed it too. Dean notes that nobody wanted to be picked for the guts match, so he says he's going to do what's best for him.

At the stable, most everyone considers Deanna the real leader - despite Aaron's status. Eric said that Aaron is Susan's dummy.

Now we go back to the Chandelier room with everyone all cleaned up and dressed up. Dean nomintes Jewel for the guts match. Aaron sends up Deanna to be sacrificed (hopefully). For the match race, Jewel picks Shoot Yeah as her horse. Deanna goes with Kool Smoke. Once again, Alex was available for questions. Jewel didn't ask any. Deanna asked about Free to Please and Alex was mildly encouraging about his chances to win, sometime.

On the track, Jewel was encouraged by Shoot Yeah's look on the track but felt backstabbed by Dean because Shoot Yeah was one of his recommendations to her, but he didn't bet on him, preferring to bet on Kool Smoke. Almost everyone else bet on the horse of the clique they were in, in varying amounts.

And away they go!! Neither horse stumbled this time, but Kool Smoke on the inside leaned into Shoot Yeah and they bumped. In a real race, this would be grounds for a stewards' inquiry and Kool Smoke would have a real shot at being disqualified. But I guess they didn't want to burden these neophytes with details like that (or they didn't notice or care), so Kool Smoke's length win was allowed to stand.

Deanna's in the cat bird's seat with about $11,000. Unless she gets knocked out, she's almost sure to make the final three. Some guy (not sure if it was Eric or Chris) made some acidic comments about Deanna being lucky. Well, she is that, but she's also good.

In the scenes for next week's episode, miscegenation foes faint at the sight of LeVar in the hot tub with at least three nubile, young, white ladies. And the rivalry between Sarah and Deanna gets taken up a notch.

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