Jake Pavelka and Vienna Girardi spar in heated 'Bachelorette' reunion
By Reality TV World staff, 07/06/2010
Vienna Girardi has a simple explanation for why she decided to sell the story of her break-up with Jake Pavelka to Star magazine before she even broke-up with The Bachelor: On the Wings of Love star: She wanted to be first.
"Because I knew that he would do it if I didn't. I knew the real reasons -- the real problems in our relationship -- is what I was telling," she told The Bachelor host Chris Harrison during a pre-taped joint interview with Pavelka that was broadcast on Monday night's broadcast of The Bachelorette.
"I wasn't bashing Jake's character or accusing him of anything, I was just laying it out," said of the interview, in which she claimed Pavelka had been "emotionally abusive" throughout their six month relationship and hadn't been intimate with her in more than four months. "This is what has been going wrong in our relationship, this is what has been happening."
"Either way our relationship has been public, no matter how we broke up this was going to happen. The world was going to want to know what happened and we were going to be doing interviews. And I know Jake, and I know that as soon as we broke up he was going to run to a media outlet and tell his side of the story, so I wanted to make sure I had a voice also. You know I haven't had a voice this entire time and I've let everybody say what they've wanted to say about me and their thoughts about me and I wasn't going to let it happen again."
According to Girardi, the $90,000 payment -- a figure she disputed as "not true" -- she reportedly received from Star wasn't why she did the interview.
"It wasn't about the money. It was I wanted people to know the real reason this did not work, really what went on," she told Harrison.
"I wanted people to know that I did try in this relationship and I stayed with him because I thought it would be different. And I loved him and I wanted it to be different. And it never did -- it just kept getting worse and worse and worse -- and I couldn't do it any more and I knew that I had to leave when he wasn't there otherwise I would have stayed because he would have convinced me things would have stayed the same. [I mean] things would have changed, sorry. We broke up three times."
"The first month we were together it was great," she told Harrison, repeating her prior claims from her Star interview. "Like, he was crazy about me. And then from there it just kind of went straight downhill and it wasn't like we were in a relationship. It felt like we were a relationship when cameras were rolling, or we were on red carpets, or we were in public. But at home, it wasn't like we were in a relationship."
"[During the show] he was genuine... he was compassionate, he was fun to be around -- when I was around him I enjoyed being around him. He smiled, he hugged me, he wanted to be with me. We talked and we opened up together. And after the show was over, that just went away. He wasn't compassionate anymore, he didn't care. He didn't try!"
"I just wanted him to be around me and talk to me and kiss me -- like a normal relationship."
"I'm so mad at you. I'm so disgusted with you," Pavelka told Girardi when he was given his own initial chance to speak.
"Disgusted with me? I'm disgusted with you," she shot back.
"You sold me out to a magazine for payment and then flirted with me all weekend. And then I find out from my publicist," The Bachelor star replied.
"Flirted with you all weekend? I didn't even see you all weekend," Girardi said.
"That's alright I got text messages. Oh yes, I've got text messages," Pavelka replied as the former couple began a verbal sparring session that would continue through most of the 40-minute interview segment.
According to Girardi, Pavelka's refusal to leave Los Angeles -- a claim he denied -- so that he could continue to pursue an acting career (a desire he previously denied) was one of the primary causes of their break-up.
"You are a famewhore, is what you are. That was the entire reason that this entire thing happened," Girardi told Pavelka during the interview. "Because my impression was that you were a pilot and we were going to go back to Florida and Dallas and live a normal life, but all of the sudden we're in L. A. and you're pursuing a career in acting."
"At least I was pursuing a career in something," replied Pavelka, a former child actor who had been working as a commercial pilot and living in Dallas, TX prior to starring on The Bachelor.
"Sorry, actually, I do have a job now. A marketing job," Girardi shot back.
"I'm a pilot!" Pavelka said.
"You haven't flown in over a year!" Girardi replied.
"As a matter of fact, I flew just this last weekend," Pavelka said.
During the interview, Girardi also denied Pavelka's post-breakup interview allegation that there had been "trust issues" in their relationship and reiterated her previous denial of his claims that he had been the one to end the relationship.
"What he does is he runs out and says 'Oh no, she was cheating and she was this and that was this and this' -- which isn't true at all, we've never ever had cheating or trust issues. That's never been an issue in our relationship. So for you to go and say that that's what the issues were, that's not true," she said.
"You have two stories -- the first story was that you broke up with me on Saturday because I was cheating on you with Greg," said Girardi, referring to Greek actor Gregory Michael, who she met while attending a children's hospital prom near Los Angeles two days before the couple broke up via a Monday telephone conversation.
"First of all, [I] didn't even meet Greg until 9 o'clock at night at the charity event at a hospital. The only thing you had is me dancing nine seconds in a group of people and I'm not even with him."
"Why are you raising your voice?" Pavelka asked.
"Because you are the biggest fake liar I've ever met in my entire life!'" Girardi replied.
"So wait Vienna, there was no infidelity, no cheating?" Harrison asked.
"No! Not at all! There's nothing. I don't even hardly know that guy. I went to a charity event and met him with a group of people and the next day he invited everybody out and I went with my girlfriend and he was there with three other girls," she replied, referring to a Sunday afternoon Santa Monica public beach party event where she was reportedly seen kissing Michael repeatedly.
"That was it, that's the entire story!"
Pavelka also accused Girardi of having another "single guy" at their apartment on the same Saturday night, however she dismissed the accusation as ludicrous.
"I had a gay guy named Todd... who dropped by my apartment so I could pickup a dress to go to the charity event. And he talked to you! He said, 'Why is he jealous, I'm gay? I'm gay!' That's what he said, you talked to him on the phone," she told Pavelka.
"You are a liar! Can we get a 'polyagraph' test, do we have one of those? Because you would fail it!" Girardi said.
"And I'm a famewhore? I didn't sell the story, you did," Pavelka replied.
"No, you went to [People] magazine and you gave them your story," Girardi said.
"I had to [because you already had]," Pavelka said.
"You were going to do it either way Jake! I'm not an idiot. You moved me out to L. A., I have no money, I have no car -- I have nothing out here," Girardi said.
"I said [we'll do] whatever is going to make you happy. We can leave L. A.," Pavelka said.
"How many times have I asked to go back home to Florida?" Girardi asked.
"I've offered several times," Pavelka insisted.
"No. You have not," Girardi shot back.
During the interview, the couple even argued about who was going to be able to take the credit for stopping their "he said, she said" argument.
"I'm not doing the 'he said, she said' thing," Pavelka said.
"No I'm not, because he's sitting here lying, and I'm not going to do it if he's going to sit here lying," Girardi said.
Afterward, Harrison asked the couple why they couldn't have just agreed to go their separate ways amicably as numerous other failed The Bachelor and The Bachelorette couples have done.
"That's my question right there Chris!" Pavelka replied.
However Girardi appeared to dodge Harrison's question and instead changed the subject to the former couple's alleged two prior break-ups.
"She would throw little temper tantrums and throw the ring off," Pavelka told Harrison when the host asked him whether Girardi's claim that the couple had previously broke-up twice was true.
"No, we broke up twice! I took that ring off twice and it was a break-up and I was leaving," Girardi interrupted.
"Just let me know when you're done then I'm going to start," replied Pavelka, who began to grow visibly frustrated at Girardi's interruptions.
"She would test me, she would take the ring off and go sulk in the bathroom waiting for me to go in there and chase her," Pavelka replied after Girardi finished speaking.
"It was a game," he added before Girardi interrupted him again.
"It was not a game, I wanted to leave!" she said.
"You were free to leave," Pavelka smiled back.
"Really, what did you say to me when I tried to leave?" Girardi asked.
"I'm sitting in L. A. with nothing," she told Harrison after Pavelka didn't reply to her question. "I haven't been able to work because for Dancing with the Stars we didn't know where he would be each week [and] how do you find a job in L. A. when we're not even supposed to stay in L. A. [after the show ends]?"
"Okay the show just got over. We just moved into another apartment. I haven't had time, I haven't had a chance to get a job because I didn't even know we'd be living in L. A.. So I have nothing."
Harrison then asked Girardi if, given the benefit of hindsight, she felt Pavelka's participation in this spring's Dancing with the Stars edition had been "a bad thing" for their relationship.
"You didn't enjoy the time of being there?" he asked.
"I supported him because he wanted to do it. But he never, like the entire time he was on Dancing with the Stars, he never acknowledged me. Like he'd come home and go to his Twitter -- we were never together. Ever. Throughout the whole thing, we were never together," she said.
"I know at the end, when you got to dance, you were excited about that," Harrison noted, referring to Pavelka and Girardi's dance on Dancing with the Stars' season finale.
"I was excited to get to spend the time with him," Girardi replied.
"She was excited because it put her on TV," Pavelka interrupted.
"Oh whatever Jake, that's the only thing you care about," Girardi shot back at him.
"I don't want this life, like I don't want to be on the cameras all the time like him," Girardi told Harrison. "I'm getting a job -- I've already got a job actually -- a real job and I'm doing marketing for a company."
"It's in Los Angeles," she added when Harrison asked the job's location.
"Ha! Big surprise!" interjected Pavelka.
When pressed to explain why she chose to take a job that will keep her in Los Angeles and surrounded by its omnipresent paparazzi despite her alleged dislike of the entertainment industry and Los Angeles area, Girardi seemed to deem it the lesser of two evils.
"I do hate L. A. I do hate L. A. But I got a job... and I'm going to take it. If it's a job, it's job. I need a job, period," she told Harrison.
"But why not go back home? Why not get away from this, if [L. A.] is the root of all evil?" he replied.
"Because I can be here and not be involved with that," she said. "If I go back home, honestly, the reason I don't want to go back home is because when I left home everybody in my small town turned their backs... I don't want to go back to that environment. But I don't want to stay 'Hollywood' and in the lights [either]."
"Okay then what is life after this interview for you guys -- will this crap continue, [with] the 'he said, she said' and all the tabloids and giving interviews?" Harrison asked Pavelka and Girardi.
"I'm not talking behind her back, Chris. I did not ring this bell but I'm forced to deal with it because it has been rung," Pavelka replied.
Afterward, the couple resumed their argument about who broke-up with whom.
"I just feel like you have been lying about how this went down," Girardi said."I had my bags packed and was leaving, okay. I had my boxes out and I broke up with you on Monday. I called you and broke up with you over the phone. I told you I couldn't do this anymore, I left you a letter explaining everything. So then I go see that you were telling everybody I heat on you and that's why you broke up with me."
"I didn't tell everybody you cheated on me... the boy you were hanging out with told everybody you were cheating," Pavelka replied.
"No he didn't, I read his quotes," Girardi said.
"I didn't tell anybody that and he went on the record," Pavelka said.
"Okay, did you or did you not say you broke up with me?" Girardi asked.
"I did break up with you Vienna," Pavelka replied.
"I broke up with you, Jake," Girardi countered.
"I'm not having the argument," Pavelka replied.
"It's not! You are such a liar!" Girardi said. "By the way, there was a witness sitting there next to me when I broke up with you on the phone... I'm not going to give their name out, but I knew he was going to do this. I knew this whole thing was going to happen, and he's going to drag it out as long as he can to stay in the spotlight."
Although he had denied it previously, Pavelka later seemed to confirm Girardi's claims that the couple hadn't been intimate during the last four months of their relationship.
"The thing is you did an unauthorized interview and got paid," Pavelka began before Girardi interrupted him.
"Baby, be quiet while I'm talking," Jake shot back.
"This is how he treats me all the time... how do you get sick of somebody in six months?" Girardi asked. "Especially in the first month. You stopped being intimate and kissing and everything the second month we were together."
"I can answer that, just give me a minute here to answer," Pavelka replied.
"Give him some time," Harrison added.
"What guy in America would ever want to be intimate with a woman that undermines him, emasculates him?" Pavelka said before Girardi interrupted him to ask "what undermines means."
"Let him finish," Harrison said.
"The interruption is a constant thing that I'm dealing with. Everything that I do is wrong," Pavelka said as Girardi continued to interrupt his attempts to finish his explanation and cite Girardi's failure to trust his driving directions as an example.
"The problem with this relationship Chris is," Pavelka began before Girardi once again interrupted him to proclaim that he needs "a woman who has no say" and begin sobbing.
"[You] need someone who just sits there and smiles and doesn't do anything, that's what you need. You need a perfect girl who sits there just like this and does anything you want her to do and says absolutely nothing. That's what you need," Girardi said before she began venting about an argument over the arrangement of their bedroom furniture.
"You compromise, you talk about things, you make decisions together. You don't decide to stay out here [in L. A.] when you're engaged to somebody and that's not the plan at all," Girardi added afterwards.
"The problem with that is Chris that she's like a tabloid, you're getting about 40% of the truth," Pavelka replied.
"And with you, you get none!" Girardi shot back.
"And another interruption," Pavelka replied.
"Stop doing that to me!" Girardi shouted back before once again changing the topic back to the couple's lack of intimacy during the last several months of their relationship.
"To me there's more to a relationship than sex and intimacy. Those are just two factors," Pavelka said.
"Okay, so what's the main reason you felt?" Harrison asked Girardi.
"It was all of them!" Girardi replied. "Because he never tried anything -- he never talked to me, he never tried to get to know me, he never got to know my family. He was always like mean to me and treated me like I was a child. You know, he brought me to L. A. and stuck me in an apartment!"
"Chris, I just want to say something right here," Pavelka interjected. "She's asking why there is not intimacy in our relationship, this is it. She breaks me down. She undermines me. She's mean. She's always right. I never do anything right. I mean this is it right here."
After trading additional shots over Pavelka's treatment of Girardi's dog -- an argument that only ended when Harrison noted "we don't care about the dog" -- The Bachelor host asked the pair where their break-up would go from here.
"Where does this go, is it just going to escalate?" he asked.
"I'm done talking about it. I said my side of the story, I gave the truth. And until he admits the truth, I mean I think that he's just going to keep going back and forth," Girardi replied.
"So you're done talking?" Harrison asked, after which Girardi nodded.
"That's a first," Pavelka quipped.
"Is there any part of you that wants to apologize for anything to Jake?" Harrison asked Girardi after asking Pavelka to hold his tongue.
"I am sorry that I went about it the way I did, but I know you -- the real you -- and I knew you would do it if I didn't," she replied after turning to face Pavelka.
"You don't know me and I wouldn't have done it and if you really," Pavelka began to reply before Girardi interrupted him.
"Please stop interrupting me!" he snapped, causing Girardi to begin sobbing again.
"The thing is, I would have never done this to somebody that I love," Pavelka added before noting that Girardi was interrupting him once again, causing her to leave her seat and claim she was done with the interview.
"You are the vainest person I've ever met in my life!" she shouted at Pavelka as she stormed off the interview set.
"I don't think she's coming back," Harrison noted before he concluded the interview with Pavelka.
"Unfortunately that is what one of our arguments looks like," Pavelka said. "And it's kind of embarrassing."