Caitlyn Jenner has graced the cover of The Advocate magazine and opened up about what she's learned since transitioning into a woman late last summer and how she's dealt with protest and hate.

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"The media has kind of labeled me as the spokesperson for the trans community. That is not the case. I am only a spokesperson for my own journey. After that, I know nothing. Am I learning a lot? Absolutely. I'm just trying to do my best, that's all," Jenner told The Advocate.

Jenner has always feared public backlash, which is a major reason why she waited until the age of 65 to come out as transgender.

"I've had such a phenomenally good life. I worked my ass off. I had tremendous respect from people. They respect what I did athletically and in my life and raising children," said the former Olympian.

However, Jenner couldn't escape worries people might label her a freak or bash her self-worth.

"All those things certainly go through your mind. But it's natural. You're going from such a strong image -- male, athletic, superstar, Wheaties-box iconic kind of stuff -- and leaving that to go, quote, 'to the weaker sex.' Certainly, I don't see it that way. And although I really felt like I was doing the right thing, and I'm so happy that the response has been good, I was afraid I would really lose something in my life," she said.

"I can handle anything. I can take criticism. I honestly don't have a problem with it. Just don't criticize [my] kids that are dealing with this. From that standpoint, it's been good. I never expected as positive a response as I've gotten."

Jenner acknowledged people appreciate honesty, but she's still brutally scrutinized in society. Members within the transgender community have reportedly accused Jenner of being a bad representative for them considering she "overemphasizes" clothing and makeup and is "wealthy, white and privileged."

To make matters worse, Jenner openly declared herself a Republican last year, saying -- initially -- she didn't condone same-sex marriage. And in November of last year, she admitted she'll be voting Republican in 2016's presidential election. According to The Advocate, Jenner was slammed for not being "trans enough" and called "a traitor to the LGBT cause."

"There's more to being a woman than hair and makeup. So recently, I've been trying to study up on it... There is so much in life that I need to learn about who I am and be authentic with myself. But I never want to assume that this whole thing called womanhood, that I could ever experience all of that. I will be able to live authentically as female, but I've missed so much," Jenner told the magazine.

It probably doesn't help Jenner is an extension of the Kardashian family, who have built an empire of fashion, makeup products, etc. While she confessed she's more comfortable in a pair of jeans, Jenner is not going to knock her stylish clan.

"Now, my family stands out. Love them to death, but their style is certainly different. And they've packaged it and sold it extraordinarily well. Better than anybody else in history, let's be honest," Jenner said.

"[Kimberly Kardashian] says, 'If you do go out, you've got to rock it, baby! You cannot let [the paparazzi] get that picture. They'll take a picture of you with no makeup on, lousy outfit -- and they'll use it forever. You'll never get rid of it.' Kim's very good at that stuff. It does take a little bit more work if you do go out. You've got to at least look good, at least the best you can."

Jenner pressed there's "more to life and womanhood" than just that, but the I Am Cait star is still learning and coming into her own.


About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski

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