Welcome to another "Wacky" episode of the Real Gilligans Island.
we start off with a recap of last week's episodes. Guess what! they didn't get off the island last week either. But a monkey boy, some head hunters, a record producer, and the Harlem Globetrotters all showed up. Unfortunately Donna Blevins did not.
We start off by seeing someone who has a lot more personality than Donna. Coconut Howie! complete with an ascot. Besides Coconut Howie who else still wears ascots? Well besides fred from scooby Doo and Mr Furley from Three's Company?
No it is time for the Ms. Millionaires to compete. Gilligan Yawn and professor Tye-Bo now have a dilema. They need to think if they should help there team mates or if having a married couple competing against them will ruin their homoerotic fantasy.
Gilligan Yawn says "I can't do it" and as the few women who have been drunk enough around him to agree to sleeping with him would say. No Duh!"
now is the time when everyone runs to stare at a radio that has a see shell that looks "excited" as it dial.
We are going to have a dinner party. Weeeee! I wonder if it will be a disgusting food challenge? yep it is ( no really we aren't copying Fear Factor).
Anna Nicole, mmm I mean Miss Melissa says she is going to hang on like an old dog to a bone. That will be different because she is usually hanging on to an old dogs bone.
The castaways are then shown in a flurry of fried mice and vomit and Anna Nicole wins. So now it is time for Mrs Bounce to Bounce allrite allrite to "the other side of the island"
For all their efforts, the Krewe of Minnow Green get facials. Crazy Charlie ( and has no one made a Charles In Charge joke yet?) has never had one, what a surprise.
I think the real understated thing about this show is the fashion. I think Evning gowns and aqua socks will be all the rage this year.
We also get to see Andy and Mandy or is it Andy and Randi or Mandy and Randi or is it Danny and Sandy, either way we see them flirting at night. how do we know it is night? well we see the Green night camera lens out. The only thing missing from this scene was the word "SLURP" on the screen. ( No really we aren't copying Joe Millionaire)
And for being a professor why do Andy shower with his shirt on?
Time for the profs to compete, we get to build Catapults. I don't know what professor Tye-Bo teaches but it aint engineering. apparently the best way to win a competition is to copy what the other people do.
Tye-Bo says this is harder than Chinese Algebra. Could someone tell me the difference between algebra in China and algebra here in the United States. And do other countries also have their own versions of algebra? and are they harder or easier than ours? Apparently he doesn't teach math either.
Tye-bo's cocnut hits the sub first. So by cheating Tye_bo has "earned" the right to be called the professor.
Mandy cries and then hits on Zac. By the way I loved the zac Attack on Saved by the Bell.
For their efforts. minnow orange gets mattreses. Good thing for Yawn too. because he is in a hammock.
next up the Maryanns. while learning to do a winners dance Marryann Randi says the best line ever in a show Ever . "I ate balls, take one for the team"! Her Aunt is so proud to have her linging in her house.
Zac then hits on Candy or Brandy and says in a smooth Billy Dee Williams kind of way. "I'm not a Compete-er" And the women aren't falling all over themselves to get to you?
We then find out Zac brings in a lot of fish. Shh do you hear that? If I am not mistaken that is the sound of Foreshadowing!!!
When asked who he would rather have on his team yawn says Randi because The Mole between mandy's eye's freaks him out. So does the wart on Charlies tush. Charlie then tells Yawn that he couldn't catch any fish. This time I smell the foreshadowing.
Time for our clothesline challenge. mandy is excited because she has man hands! and can wring lots of clothes out. Well Lo and Behold minnow Orange finally has an idea that works and minnow green copies it this time. At which point Orange thinks that isn't right.
Mr Pot meet Mr Kettle. Hey YOUR BLACK!
Orange wins and Manhandy with the mole gets to join professor Andi in banashment. But not before we are told that mandy is Shocked and Angered and I believe she is also flummoxed and itching badly.
we get back to camp and what does randi get for winning? she gets to do laundry for her team mates. Maybe Tye-bo teaches women's rights. And for this we get to see Randi's unblurred middle finger. God bless basic cable after 9:00 pm
To liven things up around camp Gilligam Zac.. man I miss Gilligan Gooner, decides he will streak everyone with his team colors tied around his "Little Buddy". When he is done he comes by and sits on the log with only his hat covering his S.S. Minnow. Tye-bo gets uncomfortable, maybe he teaches Human Sexuality, No that would be silly.
zac then tries to use the "my mom need a lung transplant" ploy. Did you know that a lung transplant cost only $25,000?
In the fishing challenge between Gilligans Yawn decide his best bet to win is to make sure zac doesn't by being a little Beyotch. All this from the encouragement of Tye-bo. Maybe he teaches ethics. Yawn litteraly lucks out and wins so Zac is banished.
Now we have our final 7 and all the rewrds get shared. Tye-bo decides he needs to take a shower and remove the Green Flag from it. Charlie then goes Crazy and starts yelling. tye-bo then starts telling him that he is the reason Zac lost. We finally find out that Teaching a class does not mean you have class. Charlie then tells Yawn that remember he is sleeping with him.
We then get a dinner feast. Where randi decides that she will also show class and drink straight from the Caraff of wine. Got to love those orange people. Scott the host then decides that is the time to tell them about a life preserver that they want to win. Have you noticed scott likes to E-Nun-See-Ate every single word.
Who do you trust? that is the theme of the evening and the strangest thing happens. Ellie May Clampet proves she is the smartest. Go figure.
Next week radioactive vegatables wash ashore and Gilligan gets strong.