'The Bachelor' alum Ben Higgins returns to Indiana after suffering "a breakdown"
By Elizabeth Kwiatkowski, 07/07/2021
The Bachelor alum Ben Higgins is apparently doing some soul-searching in his home state of Indiana amid a "breakdown" and confusing period of time in his life.
Ben, who starred on The Bachelor's 20th season in 2016, opened up about his latest struggle as a former -- and essentially washed-up, for lack of a better term -- reality star during Tuesday's episode of Season 1The Bachelorette star Trista Rehn's Better Etc. podcast.
"I am back in Indiana right now because of a breakdown, again, in my life where I don't know what's happening," Ben admitted, according toUs Weekly.
"I don't know what this next season of life looks like for me. I'm farther and farther removed from the show, and at the same time, I need to figure out what my life is going to look like and what my legacy is going to be."
Ben reportedly acknowledged the next chapter of his life is "really exciting," mainly because he's set to marry his fiancee Jessica Clarke in November 2021, but walking into the unknown is "also really hard."
"I'm at a low place, I don't see myself as this thriving figure right now. I'm kind of lamenting and separating myself from a lot of things that I held close," Ben explained.
"It was, selfishly, one of the most unhealthy and best times for me," Ben recalled of the pandemic. "I saw everybody else around me slow down... What I recognized then is [that] I was measuring myself on everybody else still, more than I knew."
Trista reportedly said she could relate to Ben's experience in the post-Bachelor world.
"Pretty much everyone these days -- especially because of social media -- we do the comparisons, like, all frickin' day long," Trista pointed out. "[It's] really, really hard to handle these days."
Trista suggested she and Ben should team up and create a "Bachelor's Anonymous" group to help other former reality TV stars cope with life after appearing on television.
As far as his personal goals for the future go, Ben previously revealed in June 2020 that he'd like to start a family within a few years and probably adopt at least one child.
But Ben has clarified he and Jessica -- who has agreed to abstain from sex until marriage to ensure their first encounter will be special -- won't be living together in their new place until after the wedding.
Ever since they began dating in 2018, Ben and Jessica have been making a long-distance relationship work, with Ben being in Denver most of the time and Jessica living in Nashville, TN, as she attends esthetics school.
The couple's relationship began in December 2018 when Ben apparently saw Jess' photo from a hockey game she went to with her father and decided to direct message her on Instagram. After chatting on FaceTime, the pair met in person and Ben asked Jess to be his girlfriend.