'Married at First Sight' star Ryan admits he "checked out" of his marriage to Brett before Decision Day
By Elizabeth Kwiatkowski, 10/30/2021
Married at First Sight star Ryan Ignasiak has admitted he "checked out" of his marriage to Brett before Decision Day.
During Wednesday night's episode of Married at First Sight: Unfiltered, Ryan watched back a Season 13 clip of Brett confronting him shortly after returning home to their Houston, TX, apartment from the season's couples retreat.
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Jamie called Ryan's move "a stab" at Brett and added, "You have been saying all along that you're trying to make things work with Brett and you're going to do what it takes. Is that just a lie?"
Ryan replied, "It wasn't a lie."
"I was saying these things going into the retreat weekend," he explained. "Coming off of the [Dr. Pepper Schwartz] meeting, that is when I felt rejuvenated in the relationship, like, 'We have a short time left but this retreat could be a great thing.'"
Ryan continued, "And then the retreat happened and at that moment, after the retreat, I was pretty checked out. [I checked out] prior to this moment that we had [about the dating app]."
Jamie then accused Ryan of barely apologizing to Brett for downloading the dating app when his wife clearly felt disrespected.
"If nobody had learned anything about me throughout this season, it's that I don't like escalating situations. I like being able to calmly resolve them," Ryan said with a laugh.
"I think I very easily could have made that escalate, and I didn't want that to happen."
Ryan admitted, "I should have apologized there."
Jamie said while some people are afraid of confrontation, it's important to be honest and own up to things.
"I absolutely wish I would have done that," Ryan agreed.
Ryan also said on Unfiltered that he wished he had opened up to Brett and been more vulnerable in their marriage much sooner than when he read aloud a letter to his younger self.
But Ryan pointed out how he and Brett kept missing each other and flip-flopping in terms of which person was putting effort into the relationship at any given time.
Ryan attempted to explain that when Brett was all in, he was distancing himself -- and when Ryan was prepared to focus on the relationship and try harder, Brett was pretty much over their marriage.
"We could just never be there at the same time," Ryan acknowledged. "And yeah, it's frustrating and it definitely caused some growth to not happen that potentially could have."
When Brett heard about Ryan having downloaded a dating app, she couldn't believe that her husband couldn't wait just one more week until "Decision Day" to "jump back in" the dating pool.
Brett told the cameras that honesty is not Ryan's strongsuit, and she told her husband, "It doesn't line up with things you say about respect. So, if it's about respect, that ain't it. Respect is a big deal and you made that very clear."
Once Ryan left the conversation and the couple's Married at First Sight apartment, he told a producer the app had been disabled on his phone.
"The difference between Ryan and I is that I know how to be in a relationship," Brett said in a confessional. "I know what it takes to have one."
On his way to his car, Ryan sent Brett the following text message, "You're welcome to do whatever you deem best for you, honestly. I promise you, that I didn't download it with the intention of it being shown as active until after Decision Day."
Ryan added, "[I] still have no idea why it was showing as active. I never meant to put you in that position."
Brett, however, said that didn't matter at all.
In addition to Ryan and Brett, Married at First Sight's thirteenth season, which currently airs on Wednesday nights at 8PM ET/PT on Lifetime, also stars Gil Cuero and Myrla Feria, Bao Huong Hoang and Johnny Lam, Michaela Clark and Zack Freeman, and Rachel Gordillo and Jose San Miguel.