'Married at First Sight' star Johnny explains why he feels Bao is controlling, manipulative and calculating
By Elizabeth Kwiatkowski, 10/06/2021
Married at First Sight star Johnny Lam has explained why he feels Bao is controlling, manipulative and calculating.
On the latest episode of Married at First Sight's thirteenth season, Bao and Johnny's relationship seemed pretty solid, for the most part, until Bao opened up to their fellow cast members about her marriage.
"I feel like I really have been trying. I've been giving it my all. I cook, I do gourmet meals, I bake, I do all these things in the house," Bao told the group, adding that Johnny expected her to initiate intimacy when she was used to being courted.
Johnny chose not to fire back at Bao or throw his wife under the bus, but he later vented his frustrations out to his buddy Jose outside of the restaurant.
During Wednesday night's episode of Married at First Sight: Unfiltered, Johnny watched back a clip in which he told Jose that Bao's "gourmet meals" comment was "a f-cking lie."
"No!" Johnny yells. "She hasn't!... That's not honest, [Bao], why are you saying that?! And I realize it's because she's trying to make herself look good."
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Myrla Feria also appeared on the Unfiltered broadcast and asked Johnny if Bao said anything at all in the car on the ride home.
"I don't know, it's just if I saw my husband going through something really hard, I would want to be catering [to him], like, 'Okay, how are you doing? or 'What's going on, are you okay?'" Myrla explained. "So she didn't try to do anything?"
Johnny replied, "No."
However, Unfiltered host Jamie Otis -- who starred on Season 1 of Married at First Sight and is still married to her match, Doug Hehner -- pointed out how viewers haven't seen Bao be "manipulative, calculating or anything of that nature" on the show yet.
When asked what gave Johnny that opinion of his wife, he joked, "Man, how much time do we have?"
"This all starts from the very beginning when Bao admits to me that she has social anxiety," Johnny explained.
"She attributed a lot of the awkwardness we had in our initial interactions -- why there was no chemistry and no flirting, none of that -- because she says she's nervous in front of all the stuff, [production and camera crew], and she can't be herself."
Johnny claimed Bao therefore asked him "to do everything privately" and off-camera.
"And then in public, she is now kind of airing our relationship issues to everyone else," Johnny complained.
"A lot of those things she's saying make me seem like a bad guy and make her seem like an angel, but I don't agree with that. It is not that way -- at all."
Jamie then dove a little deeper and asked Johnny, "If [Bao] is saying that she doesn't want to bring up personal issues in front of the group and in public settings, but then she does..."
"She doesn't want me to do it," Johnny interjected. "She wants us to talk about it because she knows what she wants to talk about. She doesn't know what I want to talk about."
Johnny called himself "a wild card" because he says "whatever is off the top of my head" whenever someone asks him a question.
"And she doesn't like that because she can't prepare for that," Johnny alleged.
Myrla expressed how Johnny needs to be able to share his thoughts freely, just like his wife is able to do.
"I think the experts could be a good solution here to talk and figure out why it is that Bao is really uncomfortable sharing things with the group," Myrla suggested.
"It can't just be her sharing in the group and you not sharing in the group. You both have to be able to share with friends and with the group. That's why we're here!"
Johnny told the cameras that he believed Bao was playing "the victim card" too much in their relationship.
Johnny said he was tired of being blamed for wrongdoing, such as "expecting too much or being too critical."
"I feel like I'm caught in her web of stuff," Johnny said on Married at First Sight's latest episode. "I feel like I'm being manipulated and I feel like I'm being played sometimes."
Johnny accused Bao of lying in order to protect her image, claiming Bao cares too much about what other people think of her.
"I don't want that in a wife. She keeps giving herself credit for things she hasn't done -- like stuff she says she's going to do but she hasn't followed through on," Johnny complained to Jose on the show.
"I want a wife who follows through on what she commits to."
Johnny said Bao would "do whatever it takes" to make people like her and see her in a positive light.
Married at First Sight currently airs on Wednesday nights at 8PM ET/PT on Lifetime and also stars Zack's wife Michaela, Myrla's husband Gil Cuero, Jose's wife Rachel, and Ryan and Brett.