'The Bachelor's Kacie Boguskie: I want Courtney Robertson happy
By Elizabeth Kwiatkowski, 03/02/2012
The Bachelor bachelorette Kacie Boguskie, a 24-year-old administrative assistant from Clarksville, TN, was eliminated by Bachelor Ben Flajnik, which narrowed his love search to three women, but then returned to the show in search of some answers and closure during Monday night's broadcast of the ABC reality dating series' sixteenth season.
During a Thursday conference call with reporters, Kacie B. talked to Reality TV World about her The Bachelor experience and broken heart -- including what has surprised her most as she's been watching the season play out, whether she traveled to Switzerland just for closure or was secretly hoping Ben would give her a second chance, why she believed her and Ben wouldn't be a perfect match after all, who she said it wouldn't be right to judge, and how she summed up Courtney Robertson in one word.
Below is Kacie B.'s conference call. Click here to read our earlier interview with the bachelorette.
In addition, click here to read our interview with Nicki Sterling, the 26-year-old dental hygienist from Hurst, TX, who got eliminated during Monday night's broadcast of the ABC reality dating series' sixteenth season.
When you had your conversation with Ben in the hotel room during Monday night's episode, he said he felt like you two were "worlds apart." Do you feel like your hometown date had a lot to do with it, and prior to that, did you think he planned on keeping you around?
Kacie Boguskie: I think that coming to my hometown and to the south, which was unfamiliar to him. It was the first time he's ever been down this place. I really showed him a different world as much as I'd like to think that California and Tennessee aren't that different, they are. And so, I think it influenced his decision.
Did you feel like Ben shut down and got a little cold towards the end of your conversation with him in the hotel room?
Kacie Boguskie: No, I don't think that it's like he's shutting down and is cold. I just think that he's really processing what you're saying and making sure that he's taking it all in, and if he has any questions for you, that he's going to get them out before he doesn't have the chance to.
Can you rate Courtney and [Lindzi Cox] and who you think he should end up with?
Kacie Boguskie: I think honestly watching the way he interacts with both of them, I'm "team Lindzi" because I love Lindzi. But for his happiness and compatibility, it seems like him and Courtney get along great.
What has surprised you most since you've been watching The Bachelor back?
Kacie Boguskie: Oh that's a tough one, the biggest surprise I guess is watching him with other women and seeing how they bring out different sides of him.
When you were watching the season back, did you understand more why he let you go?
Kacie Boguskie: Yeah, I think watching the show has been very therapeutic and it has let me see that maybe there are differences there that wouldn't have lasted.
When you visited Ben in Switzerland, did you go there with the hope he'd take you back?
Kacie Boguskie: Initially whenever I went, I was not going for a second chance. I really wanted closure and just to make sure that I knew I had said my peace about Courtney, because I really do care about him and I want him to be happy.
But of course there was that little part of me that maybe hoped he would see -- if he saw me again -- that he would be like, "Oh I made a mistake and I want you to stay." But I was not expecting that at all and that's not why I went back.
Looking back, do you feel kind of glad that you didn't make it all the way to the end because you might have realized he's not the guy for you or do you still have the mindset that you were in love with him and if he had picked you, it probably would've worked?
Kacie Boguskie: I did genuinely fall in love with Ben while I was there and I think that I'm glad that I left when I did though because my feelings just would have progressed more and I really think, in retrospect and after watching the show, that we wouldn't have been the best couple maybe later on. And so, I'm glad that as much as it did hurt, that I didn't get any further in my feelings.
Could you elaborate on why you don't think you'd make a good couple?
Kacie Boguskie: I really think Ben described it well when he said we were from two different worlds and I think I didn't want to see that at the time, but now I get it. I think that we'll be great friends, you know? And we are very compatible and would have a lot of fun, but I just think that there are differences that in everyday life, we would have to compromise on.
Do you regret talking to Ben about Courtney at all considering he basically ended up not taking your advice anyway? Do you think you will be able to remain friends with him if he does pick her?
Kacie Boguskie: I definitely don't regret talking to him about Courtney and I was prepared for him to be very standoffish whenever I brought it up, but he was very open to hearing what I had to say and said the things that I said were concerns to him.
But him still choosing to pick her is his decision and for him at the end of the day, it's about what makes him happy and hopefully if he does choose her, then it is her that makes him happy. So I think after all of this, him choosing Courtney doesn't affect how I feel about him as a person, because I really do think he is a great guy and I don't it will affect a possible friendship later.
What was it about Courtney that rubbed you the wrong way and what do you think about her now after watching the season play out?
Kacie Boguskie: I think for me personally, it was the little jabs that Courtney would make and the little comments she would make under her breath and the way that she would position herself to be noticed more, and those are things that I wouldn't do.
Also too, I've said this, that I think she has two sides and there was a side that she had around the house and there was a side that she had around Ben. I have a problem with somebody who has two different sides because I don't know which one is really you. And so, that's what I had the most trouble with about Courtney.
Now that you've been on the show, do you have a better idea of what you're looking for in a relationship?
Kacie Boguskie: Oh, definitely -- since the show has aired even. Being there, you learned a lot about what you want but I think also, it just really made me evaluate what I do want in somebody. It's been great. That's been one of the positives that's come out of all this.
So what would you say you're looking for then? What do you hope to find in a guy?
Kacie Boguskie: Oh goodness, where do I begin? (Laughs) I think my first two qualities that I really want that I think have always been consistent in any relationship I've had that I've made them work is I do want somebody who has the same religious beliefs that I do and I want somebody that's going to be like my best friend.
Other than that, I want somebody who's adventurous and fun and that likes to stay on the go and likes to try new things. There's a long list, but I think those are probably my top three.
So now that you've watched the show and have gotten the big picture, how have your feelings changed about Ben?
Kacie Boguskie: I think that watching the show, I still think that Ben is a great guy and I have the utmost respect for him and I've really -- watching the show and seeing why he let certain people go when he did, made me respect him even more.
He didn't want to lead anybody on and at the same time, it just makes me question a little bit what he was looking for. I thought it was maybe somebody -- I told him I was ready -- that I wanted to be a mom and have a family and sometimes, that scares people off. I thought that that might be the point he was at in his life too, but...
Do you think Ben actually took anyone's advice to heart about Courtney or do you think he just brushed it off when you, Emily O'Brien or Nicki Sterling approached him?
Kacie Boguskie: I think in the beginning, he kind of brushed off what Emily said, but when I went back -- I mean, I flew across the world to go and talk to him -- and I think that he also -- I'm not saying that he didn't have respect for other people, but he had a level of respect for me and I think coming back, he saw my genuine concern.
I mean, after watching it, I was like, "My goodness." I knew my heart was racing, but my voice was shaking and I think that he knew that I genuinely loved him and cared about him and wanted him to be happy, and that's why I was saying something. So I think that he really gave that a lot of merit.
Courtney was recently spotted trying on wedding dresses. What are your thoughts about that?
Kacie Boguskie: I think if they were to ask me, it depends on where I am in my life. It's not right now since Emily Maynard's it. It depends on where I am in my life and if my family would be onboard, because it's a group decision at that point, you know? They have to be a part of it as well.
How do you feel about your own behavior during the season as you've been watching the show back?
Kacie Boguskie: I think that my behavior is portrayed just the way that I am in real life. I am exactly the same way on TV that I am in person, and so, I was very pleased.
Of course there were times that I said things where I wished I hadn't, but I think that anybody, when they hit that wall of frustration, they might lash out. Those are things I wish I could take back, but I can't, and I unfortunately had to watch them again. But other than that, I feel like I was very respectful.
Is everything okay between you and your parents now considering you told them you'd make decisions on your own that they may not necessarily agree with and everything?
Kacie Boguskie: Yes. Everything is great between my parents and I. I think this has actually been very good for all of us to be more open about things and discuss -- I mean, I've never had to deal with a situation like this before and they haven't either.
So I think it brought us closer, but it's also made them realize, you know, that I am a grown woman and I have my opinions and I'll make my own decisions and they'll have to respect that.
What surprised you most about Courtney while watching the show and if you could use one word to describe her behavior throughout the show, what would it be?
Kacie Boguskie: I would say "manipulative" because of both the way she acted around us -- I'm not sure who she manipulated any more, us or him, but I feel like at some point, she was manipulating somebody.
Was there any point in the season where you were shocked about something Courtney did?
Kacie Boguskie: Oh, when she went skinny dipping! I mean, are you kidding me? My jaw dropped. (Laughs) I was like, "Where was I?!" I was sleeping, I guess.
Emily said she would not be happy if Ben had selected you, Lindzi or Nicki because she felt that him and Courtney maybe deserved each other. Do you agree with that sentiment?
Kacie Boguskie: I don't know if I like the word "deserve." At the end of the day, I just want him to be happy and ultimately, Courtney is a human being and I want her to be happy too. So, if they are a great couple, who are we to judge how they work and who they are?
There's somebody out there for everybody, I believe. And so, if they're meant to be, then I think they should be together. But I think that it's been sweet of everybody to be like, "Ben deserves Courtney" and not Nicki, Lindzi or I.
Kacie Boguskie: Oh my God. (Laughs) That's a lot of seasons! (Laughs) I mean, I'm part of a very large family I guess at this point and I've met a few of them, and they're all great guys. People on this show are so awesome and amazing that I can see why it works out when people find people from other seasons.