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Emily Maynard: 'The Bachelorette' bachelor Ryan Bowers "didn't sit well in my heart"

By Elizabeth Kwiatkowski, 06/19/2012 

Emily Maynard says bachelor Ryan Bowers, whom she eliminated during Monday night's The Bachelorette broadcast during their one-on-one date together, was straddling the line between confidence and cockiness.

"There was always something about him that didn't sit well in my heart. Despite his telling me I'd be a great trophy wife, it always felt like every conversation we had somehow led us back to his love for football or some other great attribute he possesses. I've always been attracted to the type of man that has a quieter confidence, and there isn't anything understated about Ryan's confidence," The Bachelorette star wrote on her People blog.

"While we did bond over our passion for our faith, I never felt comfortable being myself around him without feeling like I was being judged. That night I even asked Ryan if he would ever be the Bachelor, and he never gave me a yes or no answer, so that should have been warning sign number 1,298,398. Despite all of this, for some crazy reason, I still had such a hard time sending him home, and I know he was just as shocked to be going home. I'd be willing to bet he doesn't hear the word 'no' very often."

Maynard might've seen too many red flags with Bowers, but she didn't even feel a spark with bachelor Travis Pope.  

"People always ask, 'Why did you keep the guy with the egg?' I hope that after this date you all got to see what a fun, genuine guy Travis is, and can see why I had such a great time every time I talked to him. Comparing a lady and her daughter to an egg is never a good idea, but thankfully we got to know each other beyond Shelley. We had so much fun exploring Dubrovnik and enjoying each other's company, but we both knew early on that we were destined to be good friends," Maynard explained.

After Maynard's one-on-one dates with Bowers and Pope ended badly, Arie Luyendyk Jr. was quick to lend The Bachelorette star a shoulder to lean on. 

"That night [after eliminating Ryan], I was feeling a million different emotions, so when I saw Arie standing at my door, I couldn't have been happier. We've had this crazy pull to each other since our very first date and he is the person I looked to if I needed cheering up. To hear how happy he and the other guys were about Ryan going home made me more confident in my decision. And it made me more confident in my relationship with Arie, because I could see how much I meant to him," Maynard said.

It didn't take long for Maynard and Luyendyk Jr. to get back on track after she had made him sweat during the prior week's Rose Ceremony for not backing her up as much as she would've liked when former bachelor Kalon McMahon called her daughter Ricki "baggage."

"I was really happy that Arie and I were able to pick up right where we had left off, despite our bump in the road in London. I was too hard on him, but it was only because I felt so close to him, and I'm glad he was able to forgive me," she explained.

In addition, Maynard said she had "a lot of fun" during the group date's afterparty -- and maybe even a little too much fun.

"I honestly didn't realize I had kissed so many of the men. Oops. There's not much I can say to defend myself other than if you can't kiss a bunch of cute boys when you're the Bachelorette, then when can you? I obviously take my position very seriously!" Maynard added.

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