'Bachelorette' suitor Frank Neuschaefer dumps Ali Fedotowsky for ex
By Reality TV World staff, 07/20/2010
The Bachelorette star Ali Fedotowsky's bachelor field got narrowed to two when Frank Neuschaefer decided he still had feelings for his former girlfriend and withdrew from the competition for Ali's final rose during Monday night's broadcast of the ABC reality dating show.
Frank's decision left Roberto Martinez, a 26-year-old insurance agent from Charleston, SC, and Chris Lambton, a 33-year-old landscaper from Dennis, MA, as Ali's two remaining suitors by default.
"One thing I can confidently say is I am 100% positive that Frank isn't the guy for me, and I look at the two of you and I am so grateful that I have two amazing men here," The Bachelorette star told the men a day after she had sobbed and struggled to understand Frank's decision.
"The qualities that I'm looking for in someone to be with are honor and respect for other people. And I think those qualities describe both of you."
The Bachelorette's ninth sixth-season episode began Ali's three remaining suitors preparing to travel to Tahiti for overnight dates with her. However while Roberto and Chris were eagerly anticipating the dates, that wasn't the case with Frank, a 31-year-old retail manager from Geneva, IL.
"As my feelings for Ali have grown, these feelings inside me have been brewing for an ex-girlfriend [named] Nicole." he explained. "An ex-girlfriend that Ali doesn't know about. She was the last girl I dated before I came here and as I've fallen in love with Ali, I'm beginning to realize I might still be in love with Nicole, and I don't know what to do. I have been an emotional wreck... it's killing me that I have feelings for two girls."
Frank then decided to travel home to Chicago and try and determine whether he was truly still in love with Nicole. Once there, he discovered that she also shared his lingering feelings and wanted to get back together.
"Ever since you left, [it's] literally, like, consumed my entire mind -- every day," Nicole told him. "Without you I'm just not happy, I don't feel complete. It's sick. I never would have thought somebody would actually complete somebody. You need to come home."
The conversation resolved all the conflicting emotions Frank had been feeling.
"I think today is exactly what I needed to realize that I'm in love with Nicole, and Nicole is the girl I want to be with the rest of my life," he said afterwards.
"I feel like everything I've ever done in all of my relationships and trusting my instincts and following my heart has led to this moment and has paid off. And I'm in love with this girl and she's in love with me, and I think I'm going to live with her happily ever after, and that's what I've always wanted."
However Frank also realized that revelation also left him in a tough spot with regard to Ali.
"Now that I've seen Nicole, I have to go to Tahiti and tell Ali that I'm in love with someone else, and then I have to leave," he lamented.
"This is bittersweet because I'm so happy to have found love with Nicole but at the cost of hurting somebody that I care about. I can't begin to imagine how that conversation is going to go and it scares me."
Ali then enjoyed her Tahiti date with Roberto, which began with a helicopter ride to a small, unpopulated island where they got to spend the afternoon by themselves. Afterward, the pair enjoyed a private romantic dinner and Ali gave Roberto an invitation to spend the night together in a fantasy suite -- which he accepted.
"This day with Roberto has been so much better than I could have ever imagined or dreamed of. To finally hear Roberto tell me that he's falling in love with me, you know, I needed to hear that, I needed to feel how emotionally attached Roberto is," Ali said afterwards.
"He made very clear tonight that he is in this for the long haul and cares about me, and it makes me feel so good... with each passing moment I think, 'This could be it. It could be the beginning of the rest of our lives together.'"
Ali then went on her date with Chris. After beginning the date with a boat ride, the pair waded over to a small island, where they spent the afternoon wandering the shore and finding pearl oysters. Later that evening, the pair returned to a resort and had a private Tahitian clambake on a tiny island located just offshore. Afterward, Ali presented Chris with his own fantasy suite invitation, which he also accepted.
"That was like the best date you could ever go on, and now I get to spend the night with her, just the two of us alone," Chris said. "Yes, I love this girl, 100%. I don't know how to verbalize it, I just know I hate being away from her, I love being with her, and I don't want it to stop."
"She's perfect, she really is. She's everything I've been looking for. And it will be great to wake up in the morning and see Ali lying there next to me and be, 'Yep, she's the one.'"
Frank then arrived in Tahiti and discussed his situation with The Bachelorette host Chris Harrison, Afterward, Frank began to realize he may have underestimated the significance of his decision to leave Ali for Nicole.
"I think the gravity of the situation is kind of settling in," he said afterwards.
"I'm concerned that Ali's not going to understand why I didn't come to her sooner and I need to do my best to explain how I arrived at this decision. I'm dreading Ali knocking on the door. This is a conversation nobody ever wants to have, but it's my responsibility and right now, nothing can make it easier. I just hope that she can find some way to understand."
Meanwhile, Ali gushed about what she still believed would be her upcoming date with Frank.
"I've already had two days this week but I feel like my date with Frank is by far the most important. Because our relationship has been all over the place -- up and down, and backwards and forwards -- but Frank and I have an amazing connection. I am head-over-heels for him, I feel like. He makes me happy, and I can smile and laugh and just be myself," she said.
"Today I'm going to take Frank sailing, I'm really excited... I really miss Frank, I need this day. I'm so glad it's here."
Ali then met with Frank, who immediately told her "we need to talk" and attempted to explain that he had decided he was in love with Nicole.
"What's going on!" Ali begged as Frank sat silent and struggled to begin to explain the situation.
However once Frank revealed his feelings for Nicole, Ali's fear and worry quickly turned to sorrow and anger.
"If you were having these feelings all along, then why didn't you say something to me?" Ali asked as she began sobbing. "Frank, I can not believe this! I was so excited to met you [today]."
"I feel like every second I had, I used just to let you know like, 'Frank, I want to be with you, you're great, please just believe in that. Believe in that, stop thinking about everything else, stop thinking about the other guys,'" she continued. "And still, as much as I tried to reassure you, you just kept pulling."
"If I would have known sooner, I would have told you sooner," a tearful Frank replied after a long silence. "But I just worried like what if like, you were just like, 'Leave.' And I didn't want to leave, like I was falling in love with you, and I wanted to see."
"I just think it's so selfish of you to have done this," Ali said. "I've given up everything to be here!"
"I gave up everything to be here, too," Frank replied.
"Apparently not everything," Ali snapped back.
"I'm sorry Ali," Frank said.
"I don't want to leave, and I know I'm not going to talk to you again. And I was just anticipating today, and... argh!" Ali cried as she continued crying. "I just can not believe you're doing this right now. This is the last thing I ever thought would happen."
"I'm not even asking you to forgive me right now, but hopefully eventually," Frank replied through tears.
"Okay, I'm going to go. I need to deal with this somehow," Ali sobbed before she exchanged a goodbye hug with Frank.
"I'm sorry," Frank whispered. "I'm sorry."
Afterward, Ali received a beachside visit from Chris Harrison, who offered his condolences.
"I'm so angry at him! I wish he had talked to me about it -- even said one thing before, and I would have said, 'Okay, let's talk about this," The Bachelorette star vented. "Like I've given up my job -- my whole freaking life to be here -- and he, out of selfishness, keeps himself in the game because he doesn't want to be honest with me?" I just think that's such a cowardly thing to do."
"Now I'm starting to question myself, like why am I felling right now that I hope Frank comes back? I don't want Frank to come back, but there's something in me like, 'Oh, maybe I can go back and talk to him again and he'll stay.' But why would I even try and do that in my mind? I feel so weak right now, and I think that's what's making me most angry, that he put me in a place that's making me feel this weak."
"This just always happens to me!"
Ali continued to struggle to understand Frank's decision and question her own judgement after returning to her resort suite.
"I just feel he's like the biggest jerk I've ever known," she said.
"I thought there was so much potential for my relationship with Frank. I thought there was a chance Frank would be my husband. And you know, going into [the Final 2] and meeting my family, like I was so sure Frank was going to be there, I was so sure Frank was going to meet my mom and dad. I can't help but think there's something wrong with me.
The next day, Ali agreed with Chris Harrison's suggestion that they still have a Rose Ceremony even though only two suitors remained.
"I've said all along, 'This isn't about me giving you a rose, this is about you accepting it and choosing me back,'" she said. "And it's really important to me that I just don't give these guys roses tonight, that they accept them. And I need to hear that from them."
Ali then met with Roberto and Chris. After cryptically revealing that Frank "has things back home that he didn't deal with before coming here" and adding that she was "100% positive that Frank isn't the guy for me," she presented both men with roses -- which they readily accepted.
"I'm so happy that Chris and Roberto accepted my roses and I'm ready to just let everything go that's happened throughout this journey and leave it behind and move forward with these two fantastic guys," Ali said.