Raven Gates and Adam Gottschalk talk moving in together, sexting, and how they make it work

Raven Gates and Adam Gottschalk have opened up about how they're making a long-distance relationship work after falling in love on Bachelor in Paradise this past summer.


Raven, an Arkansas native who owns a clothing boutique, and Adam, a real estate agent in Dallas, TX, spoke candidly about their romance and the potential to move in together during an appearance on Bachelor in Paradise co-star Dean Unglert's podcast Help! I Suck at Dating on Monday, November 6.

"We've had talks about moving in together and where the relationship is going to turn from there. Eventually, you do want to settle down and do things," Adam, 27, revealed.

"I think the weekends we do spend together are exciting. We do things together, and every time we see each other, the ball is moved forward a little bit at a time as far as progressing our relationship."

"Our end goal is to not always be long distance," Raven added. "If you're in a long-distance relationship, it's not going to be forever, and if it is, maybe you shouldn't be [in one]."


Raven, 26, admitted that Adam tends to handle the distance a little bit better, as she sometimes needs reminding that career priorities must remain at the top of their list.

"[But] Adam knows if he ever cheats on me, I will cut him," Raven said with a laugh.

On the topic of living together, Adam elaborated, "It's an end goal. That's something we want to explore. To my benefit, Raven wants to get out of Arkansas and eventually expand her business in a bigger city... and Texas really is [business friendly]... I think it's something you want to build up to and get to, and you want to settle down with somebody."

But cohabitating in Arkansas is apparently out of the question despite the location of Raven's popular Grey Suede store.

"Raven has said, 'No, you're not going to come to Arkansas. It's not for you,'" Adam revealed. "Wherever life takes us from here, we'll kind of just ride the wave."


Adam and the black-haired beauty have already met each other's parents, and their relationship seems pretty serious. So how does their love thrive when they live in different states?

Raven said "communication is key" and "boundaries" needed to be set from the start.

"And you need to be honest about your expectations of each other. I told Adam we can't go more than two weeks without seeing each other because I just think that's too long of a time... I tell him all the time, like, 'If we don't see each other for two weeks, we're breaking up!" Raven told Dean.

"Instagram highlights when we're together, but throughout the week, we're so busy... When we're not together, we're really focused on our businesses. So when we're apart, it makes when we see each other almost a honeymoon phase."

Adam said he likes to personally view the distance as "an opportunity" rather than a burden or obstacle.


"Because if you want to live together, you first probably need to learn how to live apart. I don't really consider us long distance even though I'm, like, an hour flight from her. If we were to drive, it takes about four-and-a-half to five hours," Adam explained.

The couple also disclosed how they manage to keep things exciting and interesting between them.

"I tease Adam a lot to send me some nudies, but he never does. Yeah, we don't sext," Raven noted with a laugh.

"That's what Snapchat is for... there's a tension that starts to evolve over this 14-day grace period," Adam joked. "It's something we've always played around with. Raven at first was very, very timid and shy. I don't think we have as much of a problem as we used to in the beginning."

Raven appeared on Bachelor in Paradise 4 after competing for Nick Viall's heart on The Bachelor's 21st season and finishing as the runner-up earlier this year.


Prior to his own Paradise stint, Adam fought for Rachel Lindsay's attention and affection on The Bachelorette's thirteenth season. Rachel eliminated Adam before the men's round of hometown dates.

Raven and Adam kicked off their Bachelor in Paradise experiences dating other people, as Raven was in a love triangle with Robby Hayes and Ben Zorn, while Adam pursued a romance with Raven's pal Sarah Vendal. But when Raven and Adam eventually chose each other, they never strayed.






About The Author: Elizabeth Kwiatkowski