Rubio has become the butt of comedians' jokes this week after he paused to swig water out of a plastic bottle while delivering the Republican response to President Barack Obama's State of the Union address Tuesday.
Letterman read his list of "Things Going Through Marco Rubio's Mind at This Moment" on Wednesday's edition of "Late Show." It went as follows --
9. "Doctors say you should drink eight glasses of water every speech."
8. "I think I look pretty cool drinking out of a tiny bottle."
7. "Laugh all you want -- Poland Spring just paid me $ 1 million."
6. "This would be a great closer for my ventriloquist act."
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5. "That looked presidential, right?"
4. "I'm sure they'll edit this part out."
3. "OMG, I asked for sparkling water."
2. "Marco Rubio needs his throato lubio."
1. "By 2016, won't America want a stooge back in the White House?"