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Don't try this at home -- or elsewhere!

UPI News Service, 02/26/2012 

Don't try stealing squash in Moriarty, N.M.

Evidently, this is a town where pumpkins are very, very serious business, to the point that KOAT-TV, Albuquerque, reported a 23-year-old college student with no prior arrests is headed to trial for picking up a pumpkin during her exit from McCall's Pumpkin Patch.

The pumpkin in question was worth $2, the TV station said.

Lauren Medina had already spent $75 on food at McCall's and quickly offered to pay for the allegedly pilfered pumpkin, but police were having none of that. On went the handcuffs, "no ifs or buts," said Annette Atencio, Medina's sister.

Maybe it was amateur week in the robbery business. Either way, it's a humbling business, this robbery trade.

In Jacksonville, Fla., an attempted gas station robbery was foiled because the gas station clerk -- you can't get anything by this guy -- realized the thief was pointing his finger, not a gun, at him from under his shirt.

The (Jacksonville) Florida Times-Union reported the man ordered the clerk to empty the cash register "and give me all the money."

When the clerk refused, the would-be felon turned his menacing strategy onto a customer, who laughed at him.

Some would say the idea, when breaking the law, is to make it difficult for the police to catch you.

That concept went right by Joseph Carrara, a 22-year-old from Port Orange, Fla., arrested for alleged drunken driving after his car crashed through a set of gates at the county jail.

It turns out, however, he did get away, speeding away from the incident that took place about 3:30 a.m. on Feb. 18.

The Daytona Beach News-Journal reported, however, that Carrara, at 4:20 a.m. was arrested after he almost sideswiped a patrol car.

It is also considered common practice to not make it too easy for the police to prosecute their case.

Carrara, however, allegedly admitted he was drunk and then told the police he had earlier driven onto jail property.

Carrara was charged with criminal mischief with damage to property, trespassing, driving while intoxicated and reckless driving. Not just a touch ironically,he was then taken back to the county jail.

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Copyright 2012 United Press International, Inc. (UPI). Any repr


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