Danielle Maltby is "really struggling" in the wake of former boyfriend Paul Calafiore's infidelity.
"Most days I feel myself hardening since my relationship ended," Maltby wrote. "
I honestly believed I had found my person. He was everything to me. Now the thought of dating leaves me terrified to let anyone in."
"I've been slowly draining since the lies started and my ex cheated on me. The people that know and love me, see how much this has taken from me, especially physically," she said.
"I've been physically sick from the anxiety, stress, grief and lies inflicted on me for months."Maltby went through a similar dark period after her fiance, Nick Haag, died in 2011, but said the situation with Calafiore is different because he's still around.
She said Calafiore has been trying to reestablish their relationship.
"I'm still trying to fortify my wall, all the while knowing, no matter what I block him on, he still has the capability to break it down and he's still trying."
"Somewhere in his mind though, he has made himself believe that it's ok to continue to tell me he needs me, misses me, still loves me and wants to fix everything," she told fans.
"The Bachelor" and "Bachelor in Paradise" alum said she's seeing a therapist and "working" on overcoming her anxiety and depression.
"Some days are ok, some are really good and I had a great night last night, but today, my place is still a mess and I can't get out of bed and honestly, I just hurt," she said.
Calafiore apologized in a statement to E! News in June following reports he cheated with "The Challenge" alum Cara Sorbello.
Maltby is known for appearing on "The Bachelor" Season 21 and "Bachelor in Paradise" Season 4.
Calafiore competed on "Big Brother" Season 18 and "The Challenge: Final Reckoning."
