8. Three-minute "movie" demonstrates safety procedures on JetBlue.
7. It's two hours of iPhone footage inadvertently recorded in your pocket.
6. Film was released "straight-to-dumpster."
5. It's two hours of Donald Trump demanding to see Lincoln's birth certificate.
4. Film was in French; subtitles also in French.
3. Tells the story of a vomiting robot.
2. Can hear crew laughing whenever anyone says "Hitchcock."
1. Ebert gave it two middle-fingers up.
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